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Quick or slow?Sharp or gradual?Steady decline or down, up, down, up, etc., until the final down?It helps me as I observe my mother's slow, mostly gradual, down, up, down, to know about other people's experiences. Thank you.

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It was gradual-ish. My LO was alert and awake until one day she went into a deep sleep and couldn't be roused by the staff. That lasted about a day and then she was back to herself, none the worse for wear, didn't remember a thing. But a few months later, she went into another deep sleep for a couple of days and simply slipped away without regaining consciousness.
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Reply to ravensdottir
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Mom had alzheimer's disease for about 18-20 years. She was a long term outlier.

She definitely had improvements every summer. I think getting out in the sunshine every summer helped her.

The last 18 months she was bedbound. Her decline was faster when she could no longer walk or stand.

Towards the end she got a Kennedy ulcer. The hospice RN implied she might go fast....i.e. within 24 or 48 hours. But Mom being Mom, she lasted close to 3 months with the Kennedy ulcer. She was another outlier here.

Also around this time the hospice RN and a caregiver reported that they saw Mom move her arms to reach to the sky. She was not on morphine at this time. Reaching arms to the sky is an end of life symptom.

When it was time to start Mom on morphine I moved Mom to physical hospice. My sister had threatened hospice workers and myself prior
so the hospice RN said there was better security at physical hospice to protect their workers and me.

My sister has untreated mental illness. I called my sister when Mom first got the Kennedy ulcer and my sister visited then. I called my sister when I moved Mom to physical hospice. My sister visited again at this time.

Mom rallied some days during her time at physical hospice. Probably the morphine made her feel better. Like the prior poster we were not present 24/7 at physical hospice. My sister monopolized time during the day. She had not cared for or seen Mom in 6 years. I visited briefly each day with Mom while sister was in town as I did not want to escalate anything and I told myself I've spent plenty of time with Mom over the prior 6 years. Fortunately sister left town before Mom passed so I had more time with Mom then.

The only drug Mom was on at physical hospice was the morphine and she still lasted 11 days.

I also had Mom's CNA's with Mom around the clock at physical hospice. I had asked the admin if they were allowed to be on site and they said yes.
This worked well as many had been with Mom for years and caregiver J was with her when she passed.

My boyfriend and I talked about this yesterday. Mom passed several days after my sister left town. He told me Mom was hanging on until my sister left town to pass. I think he is right as it would have been catastrophic if my sister had still been in town when Mom passed due to the untreated mental illness.

It was Day 11 of physical hospice and my sister had left town several days prior. I stopped by in the morning for a visit with Mom and picked up her laundry. Her face was yellow but eyes open. I went home for awhile. Later afternoon I had very very strong feelings to return and drop the laundry off.

I returned late afternoon with the laundry. Mom's eyes were still open and her face was still yellow. I only spent several minutes with her. I leaned over very close to her ears and loudly said "We love you and We are proud of you." I left.

I drove off. I got a call from the hospice RN less than 5 minutes later and I pulled off of the road to talk with her. Mom had passed. Caregiver J
who was on site also called me. She said Mom made a very small gasp and passed.

TLDR:

Mom did better during summers (uptick) most likely from sunshine and being out doors.

Walking, standing and moving is protective for life. The decline was faster when Mom became bedbound.

I think there is a God/higher power timing with end of life.
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Reply to brandee
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Mom was pretty helpless in her final 18 months at the nursing home, she could not even move her arms and legs more than a few inches and was mostly non verbal. It became obvious she had reached the stage where she had difficulty swallowing her saliva as in her final weeks she drooled more and the nursing home used a suction device to help clear her throat - this lead to the inevitable aspiration pneumonia that took her life.
When I chose not to send her to hospital she was deemed palliative and meds were prescribed for her comfort, these included Haldol and an injected opioid (I'm sorry I can't remember which one), she was also given oxygen. I do regret the Scopolamine to dry secretions because it dried her mouth to the point of bleeding and I've since read that although the "death rattle" is distressing to listeners it doesn't seem to bother the person dying.
I think she was pretty much stoned out of her mind over the three days it took her to die, and I'm grateful for that. My sister and I sat with her through the day but left her at night, both for our own sake and because I believe people choose their moment and some of use would rather leave without family there. On her final day we got a call that she was mottling and she lasted several hours beyond that.(On a side note - if I hadn't done a whole lot of research I wouldn't have understood what that meant) In the end her breathing hitched once, then again, then stopped.
One other thing - she apparently had a rally the day before her drastic decline. I wasn't there to witness it but I was told she was "talking up a storm", I was also told she wanted to get to somewhere. 🤷‍♀️
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