Summary from my sibling: "A tooth has fallen out which isn't such a big issue but a couple other teeth if I recall correctly are cracked or broken and whatever else the dentist said she recommended that [X] see an oral surgeon." X is minimally mobile, increasingly has delusions, is frail. Thank you.
Lealonnie mentioned a mobile dentist and that's a great idea if there's one around.
A UTI , or pneumonia is very often what kills many frail elderly with dementia at this advanced level , more so than teeth issues . You are at the point of just keeping him comfortable as far as his teeth are concerned , IMO.
He may not get an infection from his teeth. My mother had broken teeth for years , refused the dentist , never had pain or infection .
My Mom will be 97 in May and she recently had a molar break down to the gum, then had that and another bad tooth extracted BUT she doesn't have the issues your LO has. And she didn't get any anesthesia, just novacaine.
The presence of pain is the filter that will guide the decision.
The guide line I used when caring for my Husband was deciding if he was in pain.
Getting my Husband to the dentist was a task.
The fact that my Husband was not compliant, could not follow directions
the fact that ANY dental work would have had to be done using anesthesia that may have made the dementia worse.
Since he was not in pain
I could still brush his teeth
Gums were not red, no swollen areas
He was still eating (pureed food or very soft but that was due to potential aspiration not a dental problem)
Based on all that I decided to forego dental work.
I have said that when caring for my Husband I was ruled by 2 major organs
My Head
My Heart.
I only hoped that when I had to make a decision the right organ would rule.
Let your head guide you on this decision.