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:) “I’ve mastered the art of bouncing back.”
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"Dear Lord, please grant me the ability to punch people over the Internet."
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"Someday you'll go far. I hope you stay there."
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"I'm sorry, did I roll my eyes out loud?"
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"No, I'm not insulting you. I'm describing you."
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"What the heck is up with 'fun-size' candy? There is nothing fun about less candy."
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"Where do they get the seeds to plant seedless watermelons?"
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"The way we talk to our children becomes their inner voice."
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"It's like no one in my family appreciates that I stayed up all night overthinking about them."
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"My goal this weekend is to move just enough so no one thinks I am dead."
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"Can we start the weekend again? I wasn't ready..."
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:) "That's enough todaying for today. I'm done."
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“No, I didn’t lose my mind…it got scared and ran away screaming.”
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:) Replies to, why are you so cute?

I know, right!

If you think flattery will get you anywhere, then you’re right.

I don’t know. You tell me!

Ah, the alcoholic drink I gave you is finally working.

Two words: plastic surgery!

Thanks, but the spell breaks at midnight.

Well, I used this technique called ‘Furo Fushi no Jutsu’. It’s also called ‘Immortality Jutsu’ and ‘Transference Ritual’. And yeah, I learned it from the evil, legendary ninja, Orochimaru.

Is that the best you’ve got? Flatter me more.

I don’t know. Ask the mirror on the wall who’s the cutest of them all.

Well, it took me years of practice to achieve the current level of cuteness. I’m showcasing to the world.
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“My man says I treat him like a child. I gave him a sticker for standing up for himself.”
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“My wife Mary and I have been married for 47 years, and not once have we had an argument serious enough to consider divorce; murder yes, but never divorce.”
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“If history repeats itself, I am so getting a dinosaur!”
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“Why does everyone say think outside the box? What is inside the box that they don’t want us to think about?”
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"Think outside. No box required."
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“My favorite childhood memory is not paying bills.”
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"My biggest fear is that when I die my husband will sell all my scrap supplies for what I told him they cost."
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"We have creative differences. I'm creative and you are different."
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"Mess?? What mess? This is creative freedom."
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"I can only please one person per day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow doesn't look good either."
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“I am an artist. This means I live in a fantasy world with unrealistic expectations. Thank you for understanding.”
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:) “Have a good weekend because Monday will be here in 30 minutes.”
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"Surely not everybody was kungfu fighting."
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"If someone tells you that you have enough art supplies and you don't need any more, stop talking to them. You don't need that kind of negativity in your life."
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"I hate it when I'm singing a song and the artist gets the words wrong."
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"Well, well, well, if it isn't the consequences of my own actions."
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