I decided to start a joke discussion because we as caregivers need our load lightened. We need to laugh at our own situations and those of others to take away the sting and pain we go through. If you have a joke that's racy then give a heads up at the beginning of your post for those who might not want to read your post. We need to avoid that kind of humor. Please don't come on this thread and berate anyone for their choices of humor. This is our place to let go of criticism. Thanks for sharing!!!! ;o)
another classified ad…
“JODIE:
NOT sure how many characters I can fit into one advertisement, but here goes nothing. I wanted to ask you a very important and timely question. Seeing as it is Valentine’s Day, will you ma
——
“JODIE (continued)
ke dinner tonight or will I? Because I kind of wanted to finish Breaking Bad. Anyway let me know. Love, Mark.”
"TGI...Wednesday?"
“Perks of being my friend. You’ll be the normal one.”
“Retired psychic. Now I don’t know anything anymore”
“I will be writing telepathically today. So if you think of something funny, that was me.”
“What is a psychic's favorite game? I spy with my third eye."
“And here we
****!!**!!* go again.
🌞🌞
I mean
good morning."
"What the world needs is more geniuses with humility; there are so few of us left."
"I know that there are people who do not love their fellow man, and I hate people like that!"
"It is a scientific fact that your body will - not - absorb cholesterol if you take it from another person’s plate."
"It’s amazing that the amount of news that happens in the world every day always just exactly fits the newspaper."
"The first time I sang in the church choir, two hundred people changed their religion."
"There’s a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased this line."
"Everybody talks about the weather, but nobody does anything about it."
"Biologically speaking, if something bites you it’s more likely to be female."
"Life is hard; it’s harder if you’re stupid."
"To err is human, but to really foul things up you need a computer."
“[He] may talk like an idiot, and look like an idiot, but don’t let that fool you: he really is an idiot.”
“Arrogance and stupidity all in one package. How efficient of you.”
“I didn’t fall. The floor just needed a hug.”
“My death will probably be caused by being sarcastic at the wrong time.”
“Dear Santa, before I explain, how much do you know already?”
Never intentionally
"So I was asleep right, when some big random guy in a red suit came and put me in a Big random bag ... OK, so who wanted me for Christmas??"
"Dear Santa, please leave presents. Take brother."
"Do you know what I got for xmas? Fat. I got fat."
“What do you call an elf that runs away from Santa's workshop? A rebel without a Claus!“
“What reindeer game do reindeer play at sleepovers? Truth or deer.”
”Why are elves such great motivational speakers? They have plenty of elf-confidence.”
“What do you call an obnoxious reindeer? Rude-olph.“