I decided to start a joke discussion because we as caregivers need our load lightened. We need to laugh at our own situations and those of others to take away the sting and pain we go through. If you have a joke that's racy then give a heads up at the beginning of your post for those who might not want to read your post. We need to avoid that kind of humor. Please don't come on this thread and berate anyone for their choices of humor. This is our place to let go of criticism. Thanks for sharing!!!! ;o)
🐢
“Papa turtle to Son turtle:
You may disagree with me now, Son, but when you’re 500 years old, you’ll understand.”
"It's Sunday. Movement is optional."
"Sloth mode activated."
"Nope. 🦥 Not today."
"Anything you can do, I can do slower."
"Born to be mild."
"I worked out today. I lifted my eyelids."
"Sloth running team. We'll get there when we get there."
"Please sloth down."
"I'm not lazy. I just really enjoy doing nothing."
"I'm too lazy to stop being lazy."
🥰 "Don't hurry. Be happy."
"I got out of bed for this?"
"I have about 5 personalities. You're gonna get whoever wakes up first."
“Dear Santa,
It was just 🎅🏻 a phase…”
😉🎅🏻 "Works 1 day a year. Spends the rest of it judging you."
Wheeeeeeeeee!
"Wishing you a paw-sitively paw-some Christmas!"
🐾🐾🐾
“All I want for xmas
🦥
is a nap.”
🦥🦥🦥 “I only wake up for presents.”
🦥🦥🦥 “It’s beginning to look a sloth like xmas.”
"Live like someone left the gate open."
🦥 “Wake me up when it’s xmas.”
🎅🏻🦥 “Slow ho ho.”
🦥 “I’m cute 🥰 and I know it.”
🦥 “To do. Hang from tree branch. Relax.”
“A lawyer approaches Santa:
Mr.Claus, you’re named in a class action lawsuit for discriminating against the “naughty”.”
“A girl sitting on Santa’s lap, with a loooong list of xmas wishes:
You know, this could take a while - how about you and I do lunch somewhere?”
"The guy who discovered milk...
What was he doing?"
"Wearing all black today to mourn the death of my motivation."
"You think I'm sarcastic?? You should hear what I DON'T say."
"I'm not so sure about an inner child. I have an inner idiot who surfaces every now and then."
4 women, each wearing different T-shirts.
"Keep fit"
"I ❤️ sport"
"Run for life"
"Sod it - you could get hit by a bus tomorrow"
Tracey had her own slogan she liked to live by.
"You had me at 'We'll make it look like an accident'."
"I may not have lost all my marbles yet, but there is a small hole in the bag somewhere."
"I have nothing in common with people who wash, dry, fold, and put their laundry away all in one day."
"I've put myself in a time-out until I can play nice with others. This may take a while."
🐈🐈🐈
“Wreck the tree and blame the doggies.
Fa la la la la la la la la!”
🐈🐈🐈
“Wait…Did you say I’m allowed to get in the tree or NOT allowed? I forget.”
🐈🐈🐈
“Feliz Naughty Cat”
“Everything tastes better with cat hair in it.”
“Dear Santa, I’m too cute for the naughty list.”
😍😍😍😍😍😍