I decided to start a joke discussion because we as caregivers need our load lightened. We need to laugh at our own situations and those of others to take away the sting and pain we go through. If you have a joke that's racy then give a heads up at the beginning of your post for those who might not want to read your post. We need to avoid that kind of humor. Please don't come on this thread and berate anyone for their choices of humor. This is our place to let go of criticism. Thanks for sharing!!!! ;o)
Empaths be like
"I got 99 problems
but 89 of them belong to other people."
Sign outside a house:
"Beware of the dog.
But beware of the cat too (he's kinda weird)"
"It takes me like 3 days to wake up in the morning."
"I've decided to leave my past behind me, so if I owe you money...
I'm sorry, but I've moved on."
"The fridge is a perfect example of
what matters is on the inside."
"I'm 99% sure my soulmate is a DOG."
"I came
I saw
I left early."
"Not fast
just furious."
"I was normal 3 cats ago."
"Eagles may be able to soar high, but chickens never get caught in airplane engines."
"Don’t surround yourself with negativity. Surround yourself with food instead."
"Be a goal digger!"
"Should I put on my fancy pants or my smarty pants today?"
"Be yourself.
Somewhere else."
"Why don't you slip into something more comfortable
like a coma."
Who invented hugs??
I mean the 1st hug would have been soooo awkward.
"What are you doing, why are you grabbing me?"
"Shhhh just trust me."
I was invited to a wedding where it was written on two doors:
1. Brides relatives
2. Grooms relatives
When I entered Groom’s relative door there were two more doors.
1. Ladies
2. Gentlemen
Went through the Ladies and found two more doors.
* People with gifts
* People without gifts
I went through the door where it was written people without gifts and found myself outside the hotel through the back door. 😂🤣
“I work for myself, which is fun. Except when I call in sick, I know I’m lying.”
“If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, and never will achieve, its full potential, that word would be 'meetings.'”
“Hard work spotlights the character of people: some turn up their sleeves, some turn up their noses, and some don’t turn up at all.”
“It’s the job that’s never started that takes the longest to finish.”
"Today is the day
that I do everything tomorrow!"
"You are the result of 4 billion years of evolution.
So act like it."
"I have a happy personality
with a heavy soul.
Sometimes, it gets weird."
"I'm just here to
establish an alibi."
"If your coffee order is more than 4 words
you're part of the problem."
"Me (sobbing):
I can't see you anymore, I won't let you hurt me again.
Trainer:
It was a sit-up. You did one sit-up."