I decided to start a joke discussion because we as caregivers need our load lightened. We need to laugh at our own situations and those of others to take away the sting and pain we go through. If you have a joke that's racy then give a heads up at the beginning of your post for those who might not want to read your post. We need to avoid that kind of humor. Please don't come on this thread and berate anyone for their choices of humor. This is our place to let go of criticism. Thanks for sharing!!!! ;o)
A farm. The farmer wants to plow the field.
An ox is sitting happily and comfortably - in - a cart that's laying still.
The ox says to the farmer:
"This is terribly nice...what makes it go?"
-----
oxymoron
"Some days, I look back on my life
and I'm Extremely Impressed I'm still ALIVE!"
A man on the couch, totally tied up; and mouth duct-taped. Face red.
The TV is in front.
His wife, with a very happy smile, on the phone:
"Oh, hi Dave. No, Roger's decided to give the pub a miss tonight
and watch a romantic movie with me instead."
Hugs, funny lady!
"If poison reaches its expiry date
would it be - more - poisonous
or - less - poisonous?
Asking for a, emmm, friend."
"What time do ducks wake up?
At the quack of dawn!"
"Too many people are walking around unmedicated,
unsupervised and affecting my life."
"Not decorating eggs today?
Yolk's on you."
"Way too egg-cited about this holiday."
Husband & wife went for divorce in court.
Judge:
You have 3 kids. How will you divide them?
They had a long discussion, then they say to the judge:
Ok, sir. We'll come next year with 1 more.
😂😂
The joke doesn't end here...
9 months later...They got twins.
"Here, take my last piece of bacon,"
said no one
ever.
"I want to have just enough money
to be able to
decide for myself if money solves everything."
"Pie like you
berry much."
❤️
🐣🐣🐣
no need to worry:
“Easter is the only time when it’s perfectly safe to put all of your eggs in one basket.”
“I’m waiting for the Easter Wabbit. When he comes in looking so fluffy and cute with his wittle basket of Easter eggs…BANG! Easter Wabbit stew.”
“I was fairly traumatized the first time my parents gave me a hollow chocolate bunny for Easter. I was 27, but still.”
🐣🐣🥚🥚✨✨
Easter Bunny lying on the couch.
Therapist in armchair, taking notes.
There are colorful eggs everywhere in the room: behind the flower pot, on the window sill, under the chair, under the couch…
Therapist:
“I feel like you’re hiding something from me.”
“In my experience most arguments are caused by the misunderstanding of the fact that I’m right.”
“Marriage is about understanding what irritates your spouse and using it strategically.”
No man has ever won a game of “notice anything different about me?’
“Revenge is beneath me
but accidents happen”
🐣🐣🥚🥚✨✨
“Making fun of my Easter eggs???
Omelette that slide…this time.”
🐇🐇🐇
“It’s Easter,
let your hare down.”
🐣🐣🥚🥚✨✨
“I have so many egg puns,
it’s not even bunny.”
🐣🐣🥚🥚✨✨
"What is an egg’s least favorite day of the week?
Fry-day, of course!"
"The Narcissist Test:
Step 1:
Take a moment to think about yourself.
Step 2:
If you made it to step 2, you are not a narcissist."
🐇🐇🐇
"May we continue to find the strength to hop,
even on days when each hop is a challenge."
--Bunny Buddhism
🐇🐇🐇
"It is not necessary for me
to evaluate the hops of other bunnies."
--Bunny Buddhism
🐇🐇🐇
"No bunny
saves us but ourselves.
We ourselves must hop the path."
--Bunny Buddhism