I decided to start a joke discussion because we as caregivers need our load lightened. We need to laugh at our own situations and those of others to take away the sting and pain we go through. If you have a joke that's racy then give a heads up at the beginning of your post for those who might not want to read your post. We need to avoid that kind of humor. Please don't come on this thread and berate anyone for their choices of humor. This is our place to let go of criticism. Thanks for sharing!!!! ;o)
"There's more to life than chocolate, but not right now."
"Sometimes, the 1st step towards forgiveness is realizing
the other person is totally crazy."
"Please kindly go away,
I'm introverting."
Not homeless!
Wife just keeps buying PLANTS
"OK Murphy's Law,
you win.
I give up."
"I am trying to be positive
but Murphy's Law keeps finding me."
"I will not sleep
until I find
a cure for my insomnia!!"
"Man goes into the self-help section of a bookstore. He says to the clerk:
Sounds like a lot of work. Got any somebody-else-helps-me books?"
"My perfect morning:
I wake up, get out of bed,
get into a bigger,
warmer bed with no
alarm clock and
instantly fall asleep."
"I can admit when
you're wrong."
"That awkward moment
when someone you hate
is breathing."
"I'm sorry we fought.
I hate it when
you're wrong."
"Mood:
wanna sleep for 3 years."
"If you know something will go wrong
and you do everything possible to stop it from happening,
then something else will go wrong."
"He said there was no spark between us anymore.
So I tasered him!!!
I'll ask him again when he wakes up."
"As I do more laundry,
nudists seem less crazy."
"I hate it when you offer someone
a sincere compliment
on their mustache
and suddenly...
She's not your friend anymore."
"Never underestimate the stupidity
of idiots."
"Congrats!!!
You've unlocked the next level of stupid."
"I don't know why everybody hates lazy people,
we didn't even do anything."
"Make sure your worst enemy
is not living between your own two ears."
Hyphenated.
Non-hyphenated.
The irony.
"That awkward moment
between birth and death."
"That awkward moment
when Microsoft Word
informs you your name is spelt wrong."
"That awkward moment
when you sneeze, and no one says bless you."
"That awkward moment
when you leave a shop without buying anything
and all you can think is, 'Act natural,
you're innocent.'"
"The irony of all this is,
the internet was created to save us time."
"DO NOT TOUCH"
Must be one of the scariest things to read on Braille...
"Today, 2 year-olds can unlock an iphone,
open and close their favorite apps all by themselves.
When I was that age, I was eating dirt."
Hi,
I'm your brain. Do you hate this song? Yes?
Well, I don't care,
because I've memorized it and we'll be singing it
all day.