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🙂 Keep calm
and

trust in pizza
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🙂 Keep calm
and

kiss a frog
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🙂🌼 I’m a delight

…after my coffee.
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🙂 “If you are not coffee, chocolate or bacon, I’m going to need you to go away.”
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🙂 “Doctors found traces of blood in my coffee stream.”
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🥰  “You’re brew-tiful.”
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🙂🍋🍋🍋 “When life gives you lemons, trade them for coffee.”
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😇 “The road to success is paved in coffee.”
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🙂 “Science may never come up with a better office communication system than the coffee break.”
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haha, i’ll use this on my next date:

🥰 “I’d rather take coffee than compliments just now.”
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🥰 “The way my luck is running, if I was a politician I would be honest."
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"I don't like country music, but I don't mean to denigrate those who do. And for the people who like country music, denigrate means 'put down'."
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"It's no longer a question of staying healthy. It's a question of finding a sickness you like."
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🥰 "Other than the laws of physics, rules have never really worked out for me."
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Great to see Bundle here bumping up our joke section! We need it!
On the other hand, with some of our questions of late I am no longer which of the threads ARE the jokes section.
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i love being called bundle.
🙂🙂🙂🌼🌼🌼
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🙂 “To make a mistake is human, but to blame it on someone else, that’s even more human.”
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🙂 “Everyone is entitled to my opinion.”
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Alva,
Wherever I go, that IS the joke section.
I would have added rolling on the floor laughing out loud to my answer,
but I wasn't sure of the abbreviation.
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🙂 "Money can't buy you happiness but it does bring you a more pleasant form of misery."
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🙂 "I base most of my fashion taste on what doesn't itch."
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🙂 "As you get older, your injuries don't come with an anecdote any more, they just come."
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🙂 "I quit therapy because my analyst was trying to help me behind my back."
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🙂 "Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please."
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A relative ends their email to another relative, "I still love (name) and (name).

That relative responds, "We never questioned or doubted it for a second and we love you more."
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🙂 “I am a man of my word. And that word is unreliable.”
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"£3 million for the funeral of Margret Thatcher?

For 3 million you could give everyone in Scotland a shovel, and we could dig a hole so deep we could hand her over to Satan in person."
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"The bible should be one sheet of paper, and on that sheet of paper it should say 'Try not to be a jerk.' "
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🙂 "I want to hang a map of the world in my house. Then I’m gonna put pins into all the locations I’ve traveled to, but first I’m gonna have to travel to the top two corners of the map, so it won’t fall down."
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"I bought myself a parrot, the parrot talked, but it did not say “I’m hungry”… so it died.."
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