Follow
Share
Read More
Find Care & Housing
❤️🙂🎄🎄❄️❄️

🦥🦥🦥 “It’s beginning to look a sloth like xmas.”
(1)
Report

❤️🙂🎄🎄❄️❄️

🦥🦥🦥 “I only wake up for presents.”
(1)
Report

❤️🙂🎄🎄❄️❄️

“All I want for xmas
🦥
is a nap.”
(1)
Report

❤️🙂🎄🎄❄️❄️

"Wishing you a paw-sitively paw-some Christmas!"
🐾🐾🐾
(1)
Report

What did the snail say while riding on the turtles back?


Wheeeeeeeeee!
(5)
Report

❤️🎄🎄❄️❄️

😉🎅🏻 "Works 1 day a year. Spends the rest of it judging you."
(2)
Report

❤️🙂🎄🎄❄️❄️

“Dear Santa,
It was just 🎅🏻 a phase…”
(1)
Report

❤️🙂

"I have about 5 personalities. You're gonna get whoever wakes up first."
(3)
Report

🙄

"I got out of bed for this?"
(2)
Report

❤️🙂🦥🦥🦥🦥🦥🦥🦥

"Sloth mode activated."

"Nope. 🦥 Not today."

"Anything you can do, I can do slower."

"Born to be mild."

"I worked out today. I lifted my eyelids."

"Sloth running team. We'll get there when we get there."

"Please sloth down."

"I'm not lazy. I just really enjoy doing nothing."

"I'm too lazy to stop being lazy."

🥰 "Don't hurry. Be happy."
(3)
Report

❤️🙂 happy sunday!

"It's Sunday. Movement is optional."
(1)
Report

❤️🙂

🐢
“Papa turtle to Son turtle:
You may disagree with me now, Son, but when you’re 500 years old, you’ll understand.”
(2)
Report

❤️🙂🧚🏻‍♀️

“I’m the Solving-Your-Problems Fairy. I’ll come back…I’m going to need a much bigger wand!”
(3)
Report

❤️🙂🤓

“The tune in my head keeps interfering with the song in my heart.”
(1)
Report

😉

“Wish me luck. I’m going in there and not coming out until all conflicts are resolved.”
(2)
Report

😉

“A mediator hasn’t worked, so I brought in everyone’s moms.”
(2)
Report

❤️🙂

“Don’t worry about getting older. You still get to do stupid things, only slower.”
(2)
Report

❤️🙂

”4 levels of crazy:
1. Talks to self,
2. Argues with self,
3. Interrupts self while arguing with self,
4. No longer speaking to self.”
(3)
Report

❤️🙂🤓😎🥸😝😜🤪😋😉

“I’m not crazy, I’m just special!!…
…No wait…maybe I’m crazy
…One second…I have to talk to myself about this, hold on…”
(2)
Report

❤️🙂 definitely describes me…

"It takes skill
to trip over flat surfaces.”
(4)
Report

❤️🙂

"There is only one thing that keeps me from breaking you in half, I don’t want two of you around.”
(2)
Report

❤️🙂

"If we were on a sinking ship and there was only one life vest…I would miss you so much.”
(2)
Report

❤️🙂

"I'm sorry. I don't speak Whinese."
(3)
Report

With age comes wisdom.

Huh!

Apparently wisdom weighs about 40 pounds?
(4)
Report

😉

"What would have happened if you exterminated the ugliest guy and the dumbest guy in the world yesterday? Right, this post wouldn’t exist."
(2)
Report

😉

"I believe in my pet dog more than I believe in myself."
(2)
Report

❤️

"Guess who’s posting self-deprecating stuff instead of doing something productive and worthwhile?"
(2)
Report

❤️🙂

"Don’t mind me. I’m just having an existential crisis. Move along, folks."
(2)
Report

❤️🙂

"Today’s a really wonderful day. I don’t trust it."
(2)
Report

❤️🙂

"Time to get back on my regularly scheduled nonsense."
(2)
Report

Start a Discussion
Subscribe to
Our Newsletter