I decided to start a joke discussion because we as caregivers need our load lightened. We need to laugh at our own situations and those of others to take away the sting and pain we go through. If you have a joke that's racy then give a heads up at the beginning of your post for those who might not want to read your post. We need to avoid that kind of humor. Please don't come on this thread and berate anyone for their choices of humor. This is our place to let go of criticism. Thanks for sharing!!!! ;o)
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"I've learned that you can tell a lot about a person by the way (s)he handles these three things: a rainy day, lost luggage, and tangled Christmas tree lights."
“I hate it when I don’t forward a chain letter, and I die the next day.”
🏖🏖 …still waiting.
“I work hard so my dog can live the dream.”
“I’ve run the numbers. We’re allowed to get 3 more cats.”
“I was gonna take over the world today, but I overslept.”
“My dog is not spoiled; I’m just well trained.”
🙂 “I’m sorry, I was thinking about cats again.”
“You’ve cat to be kitten me!?”
“Whenever I see a cat at a party: finally someone I can talk to.”
“Saw it, wanted it, threw a tantrum and got it!”
(quote for those poor caregivers who are dealing with toxic parents for example.)
ATD: At The Doctors
BFF: Best Friend Fell
BTW: Bring The Wheelchair
BYOT: Bring Your Own Teeth
FWIW: Forgot Where I Was
GGPBL: Gotta Go Pacemaker Battery Low
IMHO: Is My Hearing Aid On
LMDO: Laughing My Dentures Out
OMMR: On My Massage Recliner
ROFLACGU: Rolling On Floor Laughing And Can’t Get Up
TTYL: Talk To You Louder
🤓 “It’s not failure, it’s unfinished success.”
🤓 “If at first you don’t succeed, give up and try something else.”
❤️ “If at first you don’t succeed, call it version 1.0”
🙃😇 “The truth will set you free, but first it will piss you off.”
Aint that the truth!
than to pee and wake up.
“My hobbies include staying up until 2 am for no reason and being exhausted the next day.”
“Reality continues to ruin my life.”
“I don’t need a stress ball. I *need* a stress bat.”
“Stress is when you wake up screaming and you realize you haven't fallen asleep yet.”
“Cheer up, the worst is yet to come.”
🙃 “Reality is the leading cause of stress.”
“I like that cute thing you do when you stop texting me for hours, it’s adorable.”
“If we were on a sinking ship, and there was only one vest…I would miss you so much.”
“I found a hotel with the most stars in the world. It has an open roof, so you can see them all.”
“Woke up today. It was terrible.”
🙃 “I’m not angry. I’m happiness challenged.”
“Yep, despite the look on my face, you are still talking.”
“If stupidity was painful, you’d be in agony.”
“I don’t need anger management courses. The rest of the world needs stupidity management courses.”
🙂 “When life gives you lemons, freeze them and throw them as hard as you can at the people making your life difficult.”
❤️ “Don’t be grumpy. That’s my job.”
“Step aside Monday…This is a job for TEA.”
“Thanks for being my best-tea!”
“I think there’s tea for that.”
“Tea! Crisis management since 1652!”
“Life hurts. More tea?”
“Team is spelled…Tea…mmmm.”
❤️ “Would you like an adventure now, or shall we have our tea first?”
❤️ “According to researchers, Monday mornings are so depressing that on average, humans don’t crack a smile until 11:24 a.m!”
“It’s been a long week.”
—Me, in the middle of Monday
“I have mixed drinks about feelings.”
“Today is a multiple cups of tea kind of day.”
❤️ “We’ve got chemis-tea!”
🦖🦖🦖 “Tea-rex.”
“Move oolong. Nothing to tea here.”
“Get your facts first. Then you can distort them as you please.”
“Everyone is entitled to my opinion.”