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What is it they say? The older you get, the more like yourself you become. And that is for mentally healthy people! But when dementia enters the picture, all bets are off. Someone who was serene, peaceful, and calm can become a jumble of nervous mannerisms. Someone who was polite can become rude and demanding. A person with dementia, like anyone else, can also have ingrained habits and behaviors become intensified. It is very hard to predict how dementia will impact a personality. It can definitely intensify "bad" behavior, but it doesn't always.
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I can attest to the fact that yes, all behaviors can change. My mom went from a very very loving mom to someone who was paranoid, angry and depressed. This isn't a choice and it's difficult to see your loved one change like this. If I can make ONE observation I would say this....remember it's not your loved one anymore in many ways but it is a person whom you have loved and cared about. They have no control of it just as we have no control of the weather. I used to get sooo frustrated with mommy for all the accusations and meanness. She passed away yesterday and I can tell you that you will certainly think about how you felt once a loved one is gone. All the times I just wanted her to go into a nursing home so I could have peace. She fell 2 months ago and did just that. The Alzheimers got much worse and she passed away quickly (2 months). I miss her terribly already. I wish you luck. It's hard but I feel it's the circle of life. I can't tell you how much mom put up with when I was a teen lol. I constantly looked at it that way. It was my turn. Hugs
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My experience tells me that Jeannegibbs is right (as she generally is). AD can cause personality changes that are nothing like the person used to be or would have been without the disease. The brain is affected by the disease and those effects can cause the sweetest person to become a tyrant. Frontotemporal dementia (FTD) has personality change as one of the first signs of the disease. This does not mean that this new behavior was lurking below the surface to increase with age. It's the disease making itself known. That's why compassion for the person with dementia is so important. They really can't help their behavior and most would do anything to be "themselves" once again.
Thanks for asking,
Carol
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