
Mom is 78 years old and developed mild verbal & memory loss after sepsis in 2013. In 2024, she sustained multiple closed head injuries from falls related to inoperable lumbar stenosis. Now she is in a wheelchair and homebound. At times she is oriented but (maybe precipitated by pain/stress?) will suddenly think I am an employed caregiver (which we don't have) and that her daughter has abandoned her. I am her only family in area.
I think she might have Capgras. I wonder whether coming meds would help.
good luck!
Then be prepared for the future when a. She no longer asks for Lisa b. no longer remembers that her daughter’s name was Lisa c. says Hi Lisa d. Stops talking. There are more options I am sure but my point is that on a good day she may recognize you but overall the disease progresses.
Just reassure her and notice whichever excuse you give for Lisa that works is a good one to use over and over until this phase passes.
For you I am so sorry because I know this is a sad moment.
Do have her checked for a UTI.
Below is a link to an article discussing the syndrome:
https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/diseases/capgras-syndrome
Speak to her doctor about this as there are meds to address it. In the meantime, just tell mom you're her caregiver who loves her when she thinks you're not her daughter. Go with the flow, in other words.
Best of luck to you.
And if and when she mentions her daughter(you) abandoning her, you can just reply that her daughter has gone to work, is at a friends house right now, or is on vacation and will/should be back soon, and then change the subject.
Your moms brain is broken so please try not to take what she says or does personally.
God bless you for taking such good care of your mom who needs you now more than ever.