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By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
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V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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The only reason I became my mom‘s Bank POA is because my other siblings were using my mom for their personal use. When I told her her she was not to do that anymore, she replied, “Watch me.”
Do you have paperwork from the bank authorizing you? If so, it's valid no matter what your sister says. You should go to the bank and talk with them about how to protect your mother's account(s). Your sister can file a legal challenge if she wants, but that would cost her money.
A bank can acknowledge your legally finalized PoA documents but they do not create a PoA for anyone. Often they will just make you joint account owner (it differs from bank to bank). It can be confusing because (in my experience) the 3 banks I dealt with copied all the PoA paperwork but then also had me fill out a whole bunch of their own paperwork (a lot to do with my identity).
I agree with MG8522: do you have PoA paperwork that your Mom created through an attorney or online service naming you as her FPoA? If not, you are probably just a joint account owner, and not an actual FPoA. No bank would allow you to become joint on her account without her being present in the bank at the time this change was made.
Mom’s dementia and combative attitude likely means she shouldn’t have access to money anymore. Giving money to your siblings could be the least of the bad decisions she makes. The financial POA, assuming you have that document, should handle her money, without mom having further access at all, keeping careful records of everything. No more checks or debit card for mom. Alert her bank of the dementia diagnosis using medical records if needed. Don’t discuss or argue with mom about this, dementia means losing the ability to make sound decisions. Hopefully you’re on her bank accounts and POA as well
If you're the only one with POA documents done by a lawyer, they are legal. If your mother is being combative about it and your siblings are trying to play stupid little games, you will have to take some drastic action that will anger everyone. You will have to ignore what your mother and siblings say and think if you want to protect your mother's money and do right by her. Doing what's right is never easy.
Go to the bank with your POA documents and open all new accounts that your mother or your siblings cannot access. If she has credit cards, have new ones issued that she doesn't have access to and put a passoword on all of them. Make it very clear that there will be NO other users EVER being put on the accounts. Also, have her mail redirected to your home. People get credit card applications in the mail with a QR code. The new scam is someone takes it, scans the QR code or calls the credit card company from the senior's phone and takes out credit cards in their name.
You have to take serious measure today. You cannot let your mother's asinine stubbornness or your siblings little games clean out her bank accounts then she wil have nothing to pay for her care with. Remove all important paperwork like insurance policies, credit card information, property deeds, etc... from your mother's home.
Or, you can resign your POA to one of your siblings and let the chips fall where they may. It will probably be a disaster, but it will take the responsibility off of you.
Stop discussing such matters with your siblings. Your mom's finances are private, and if she's given you this position of responsibility, your duty is to her, not them. Take the advice of others who have posted and safeguard all you can for mom.
The last person to listen to for advice about mom's business is a warring sibling! Get a free consultation with an eldercare lawyer and keep the advice to yourself. It's up to you whether to hire a lawyer, but usually in such matters it's money well spent. Mom's money can pay for it, not yours.
I misunderstood the OP until I read the responses. I thought it was a sibling who said "watch me." If it's your mother, I'm sorry, that is going to be challenging.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
I agree with MG8522: do you have PoA paperwork that your Mom created through an attorney or online service naming you as her FPoA? If not, you are probably just a joint account owner, and not an actual FPoA. No bank would allow you to become joint on her account without her being present in the bank at the time this change was made.
Go to the bank with your POA documents and open all new accounts that your mother or your siblings cannot access. If she has credit cards, have new ones issued that she doesn't have access to and put a passoword on all of them. Make it very clear that there will be NO other users EVER being put on the accounts. Also, have her mail redirected to your home. People get credit card applications in the mail with a QR code. The new scam is someone takes it, scans the QR code or calls the credit card company from the senior's phone and takes out credit cards in their name.
You have to take serious measure today. You cannot let your mother's asinine stubbornness or your siblings little games clean out her bank accounts then she wil have nothing to pay for her care with. Remove all important paperwork like insurance policies, credit card information, property deeds, etc... from your mother's home.
Or, you can resign your POA to one of your siblings and let the chips fall where they may. It will probably be a disaster, but it will take the responsibility off of you.
The last person to listen to for advice about mom's business is a warring sibling! Get a free consultation with an eldercare lawyer and keep the advice to yourself. It's up to you whether to hire a lawyer, but usually in such matters it's money well spent. Mom's money can pay for it, not yours.
Good luck in a bad situation.