Are you sure you want to exit? Your progress will be lost.
Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
✔
I acknowledge and authorize
✔
I consent to the collection of my consumer health data.*
✔
I consent to the sharing of my consumer health data with qualified home care agencies.*
*If I am consenting on behalf of someone else, I have the proper authorization to do so. By clicking Get My Results, you agree to our Privacy Policy. You also consent to receive calls and texts, which may be autodialed, from us and our customer communities. Your consent is not a condition to using our service. Please visit our Terms of Use. for information about our privacy practices.
Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
My Dad left the house at 5 am thinking he had to be somewhere. Then rang the doorbell to get back in. We didn’t know he had left his bed, let alone the house.
My sister and I worried about this went to local aging resource center.... Easiest solution for us would be a locked memory care unit. If he won't or financial issues.. can put sensors on doors that alert when opened. Cameras iin home. In bad cases u can have a chip installed in person just like a pet... I have gotten my dad a fall alert necklace that I hope I can get him to use that has GPS tracking. Dad still drives, it was suggested here I could put a location device in car.. make sure u have an updated photo of him in case u need to do a silver alert for him.
Yes, a small slide lock up high would be good. A 'hook and eye' closure along the top is good too. Many seniors don't think to look up, and don't explain it to him.
If an elderly person is wandering they cannot live on their own anymore regardless of how well their home has been elder-proofed (same as baby-proofed only for old people).
The options are:
1) Move the elder into a locked memory care facility.
2) Bring in 24-hour caregiving services into the elder's home. Or move the elder in with family. In either scenario whatever home the wandering elder is moved to every door and window has to be fitted with locks that do not open without a key. Or the elder's bedroom door has to be locked from the outside. Outside grates over the bedroom windows too if needs be. I had an elderly client years ago who was a wanderer. She was super fit physically, but her mind was shot from dementia. She lived with her daughter who used to lock her bedroom door from the outside at night. The woman crawled out the window. I asked the daughter why she didn't put her mother's bedroom on the second floor, and it was because she would regularly crawl out of the window at night. Then some neighbor going to work or putting their kids on the bus in the morning would find her and bring her back. Or she'd knock on someone's door and say she was locked out of her house. I remember telling her that her mother getting out and potentially getting hurt wasn't the only terrible thing that could happen. There was a first-story window left open in at night that a 80-year-old could get out of. Who or what can get in? The daughter also had a husband and three kids living there. Her answer was she wasn't worried for the family because they had security cameras and the husband had a gun. She was unaware that criminals also have them and a fat lot of good a security camera does when everyone is sound asleep. One morning I was heading to their house and I found her walking up the sidewalk in nothing but a soiled Depend and a t-shirt. I called her daughter to come and pick her up because I would not put her in my car. I was able tptalk them into getting metal security grates put over the first-floor windows in her mother's bedroom. They only agreed because I told them that I'm obligated to report the incident to the police and APS but that I wouldn't if they got it done. They had child safety locks put that day and then the grates. Sure the mother was angry because she was literally locked down at night like jail. It was that or go to memory care. Those are about the only two choices.
Yes, this is what we did with my MIL, who wandered.
https://www.amazon.com/Security-Childproof-Reinforcement-Withstand-Nightlock/dp/B07MG4KR7G was put on the front door.
She was an enfeebled old women who couldn't reach it. But it might also confound an elderly male with dementia, because it is hard to open even if you do know how to open it, especially if it is out of easy reach.
Another possibility is a deadbolt lock that locks from the inside. You could tell your parent that you are afraid of crime and are upgrading your security.
Locking a person in a room maybe illegal. Its a fire hazard. My cousin had inside key bolts. Someone was with my Uncle 24/7. When he passed, my cousin had them removed because they were considered a fire hazard.
The door in my Moms area was a round knob. I bought child protective covers. For Mom, they just went round and round. For me, I knew the trick needed to open them.
DMadina, if your Dad only leaves the house when it is dark, I read that putting a black throw rug in front of the exit doors, Dad will think there is a hole in the floor.
You wouldn’t know if they only leave the house in the dark because they can change any time and start leaving in the daytime. You can’t trust what they’ll do ever.,
You should not lock someone into a room even if someone is in the house in another room. A dementia patient could set the room on fire and not be able to get out. Actually that goes for anyone. It’s illegal everywhere I know of. It’s restraint, elder abuse, false imprisonment or whatever. You can lock someone in the room with the patient if they know how to get both of them out. Generally at this point it’s time for memory care.
How about making sure the person who is out of it enough with dementia that they need to be locked in doesn't have any access to matches or lighters. I'd say even check them for for a pieces of flint also just to be safe. Pat them down for drugs and weapons too before locking the door. Let's be honest here about dignity issues. Many people find the locking in to be one. When the elder's dementia has progressed to where they have to either be watched 24 hours a day like a toddler or locked in, they really have no dignity. At this point the goal is really keeping them safe and being kind to them. I've worked for many seniors who had a good life with their family at home. They were locked in their room at night when it was bedtime. No one slept in there with them. Most people aren't millionaires so it's absolutely ridiculous to pay a babysitter to sit there all night so they don't wander off. A family can buy a $20 baby monitor at Target and $10 lock at any hardware store and install it on the outside of the door. Problem solved in many instances. I can't see how it's better for an elderly person or their family they live with to put them in memory care if everyone is happy having them and they're being cared for by family. I've taken more than a few people to the store to buy door locks for grandma/grandpa's bedroom and even installed a few myself.
Scary! Wandering is often a clue that he may need to be in a secure facility (memory care) for his own safety. Someone else was talking about door alarms on another thread. Could put one on his door so you'll know when he leaves his room or maybe better to have one near the exits so you'll know if he's near them.
Door alarms seem like a great idea, but it's not great when they go off in the middle of the night and the spouse caregiver can't get a decent night's sleep. Ditto for cabinet alarms, bed pad alarms, etc.
confounding locks a pad under his sheets or on the floor that will set of an alert in your room when he moves off his bed oh..and if he's wandering, make sure he cannot access the kitchen. lock that door if there is a door to lock. Otherwise disable the microwave and oven, lock the fridge, lock the cabinets, lock the drawers, etc.
We added alarms to the doors and also purchased a GPS tracking beeper that Dad wears all the time. It s a great device because he cam also push the emergency button on the device if he gets scares or confused.
Can you provide more info on the beeper you purchased? In our county, our local sheriffs dept. provide a device to help find them once they wander. I haven't checked into it yet to know whether we personally can also track it.
Installing a wireless security camera has been a wonderful solution for me. I started with just one in my father’s bedroom but have since added several to other areas of the house. You can set them to alert your smart phone when there is movement plus you can deactivate the alert function during the daytime when it is not needed. I cannot speak for all brands, but I have been happy with Wyze. The cost per camera is reasonable (I believe $34.99 USD), and there is no monthly fee if you just want the basic view/alert functions.
I don’t think anyone else has mentioned this consideration, but I have found a few other things have helped my father’s wandering. Essentially, those two things are regulating his sleep and adjusting his medications. The dr had to adjust his medications several times to get the combinations correct so that he sleeps most all of the night. When I took over his care upon my mother’s passing (we have no other family and I, by the grace of God, became eligible to retire early six weeks later), I found that he was allowed to sleep a great deal during the day so he was not sleepy at night. Later during his care, I found that some sitters were allowing him to take long naps during the day (I have him about 130 of the 168 hours each week because I recognized early on that I would not be able mentally or physically to care for him 24-7 for very long). After I explained to the sitters what it does to him when he cannot sleep at night, they got better and his nighttime wandering almost stopped.
I hope this information is helpful, because I know what it is like to have to deal with wandering.
When my husband started wandering, I had an alarm company put sensors on all the outside doors. I would set the alarm at night. If he set it off, it would startle him and of course, wake me up. During the day, even when the alarm was off, it would bing when opened and say, " Front door open" or whatever other door was opened. However, with dementia, each week brings a new problem to solve, and you begin to feel like the little boy putting fingers in the leaking dike. Sooner or later, you run out of fingers. Memory care becomes one of the only options. I'm praying that God will comfort you and give you wisdom. It's a hard path to walk.
Does your Dad still drive? Sorry, but its time for him to stop. Disable the car, you or his doctor report to DMV and alert the police of an unsafe driver. ID bracelet or chip to find him and corral him into memory care.
Your internet/phone carrier can put a sensor on the door. A camera will face the door. Should your loved one "escape" a text will go off with a photo. Keep the phone next to your bed.
This feature cost about $20 per month. You can do a lot of add-ons with these things. How about some type of deadbolt that is not easily accessed on the main door to the house NOT the bedroom door.
I read an article where there some device if you turn the doorknob an alarm goes off. Has anyone heard of this?
We need to keep our loved one's "safe" but not feel imprisoned. They need to be protected and a lot of these gadgets you can go online for the latest. Your local hardware store can assist you.
I would contact your neighbors and local police so they will be aware should your dad wander. I have an ID that I am going to put on my mother when we go grocery shopping should my mother wander.
Did you know that placing a black mat on the floor in front of a door may keep an Alzheimer’s or dementia patient from wandering through that door? Some patients due to changes in the brain caused by illness are actually seeing the mat as a hole.
Youcan also put a movement sensor in his room. They are inexpensive and the alarm can be in your room.
Smart phones can now trace a tag they provide. You, again, could put the tag on his shoe laces or some such thing. You could talk to your phone provider about this.
We put a latch on the top of the door for my dad BUT nothing is 100% fail proof so plan for the inevitable. My dad always carried his wallet, even after no longer driving. We made sure contact info was in his wallet. We also found small metal plates that we had engraved with contact info and weave into shoelaces. My dad did happen to get out of an unlatched door door one day and wandered 15 blocks away. My mom noticed he was gone and panicked, called me and the police and a hunt ensued. A wonderful man found him, by the lake!!!, and saw the info on his shoelace plates on his shoes and brought him home. That day we admitted him to memory care.
Nanny cam with multiple cameras (Zmodo is mine) with night vision, and door sensors in addition to locators ( Tile is mine) attached in appropriate places on clothing, shoes, etc. Nanny cam and locators paired with smart phone. Don’t have smart phone? Invest in one and learn how to use it. Knobs off stove and a microwave that only goes for 3 minutes.
I purchased this door lever lock for my mom who was constantly wandering during the day and at night to the point that I got no sleep!...it was a lifesaver (link below)! Amazon.com: Improved Childproof Door Lever Lock (2 Pack) Prevents Toddlers From Opening Doors. Easy One Hand Operation for Adults. Durable ABS with 3M Adhesive Backing. Simple Install, No Tools Needed (White, 2) : Baby
We had double sided key locks on all exteriors doors and had hidden places for the keys. At night (sundowners) he would especially want to leave and asked for the key. We would say we can’t find it and will look tomorrow. He eventually gave up and the desire to leave subsided more. It was the falling and advancing Alzheimer’s that caused us to finally move him to a nice assisted living facility that had memory care integrated with the whole facility so he was not stuck in a separate boring memory unit area like some do.
My husband has mild dementia and is in a wheelchair; however, this does not stop him from trying to get out of bed at night to use the bathroom (or explore the downstairs). I purchased a baby monitor from Amazon with 2 receivers. I placed the base in his bedroom (downstairs) and leave it on all the time. I put one upstairs in the spare bedroom where I sleep and the other one in the family room. I can hear him wherever I am in the house. This has been a lifesaver for me as he doesn’t remember he needs assistance to use the bathroom. Yes, it wakes me up at night, some nights he tries to get up and use the BR 3-4 times. I finally hired a caregiver that spends 2-3 nights per week, when she is here, I turn my monitor off and get some sleep. In the beginning it was difficult to stay in bed and let her “care” for him, but I’m wiser now and know I need those nights to “catch-up” on my own sleep. I also bought an inexpensive home security system with sensors for the outside doors (you can also purchase extras for the windows if that is an issue), a camera which I placed in his bedroom, and a motion detector which will let me know if he leaves the bedroom during the night. Truthfully so far, I haven’t used the motion detector, the baby monitor alerts me to any movement in his room. There are many good ideas on this forum, hopefully one will work for you.
Speak with Physician for referrals to consider new assessment, evaluation of the patient ; there may be some medical considerations and treatments ( medicinal ) to consider. Also get referrals to specialist to help sort out safety needs in home.
That being said many people resort to: bed alarms, cameras, motion activated lighting and alarms, cameras ( all over the place), monitors with visual and sound.
" Restraints" are against the law...
Speak with Physician and others for guidance on what is your responsibility, accountability, expectations, liabilities etc etc re having such a " high risk" patient in the home.
Nursing home/facility rules don't apply in a person's home. When a family member moves a loved one with dementia into their home they assume the responsibility for their care and safety. There's not a full care staff on duty 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. It's usually only one person. Maybe two if they've got a spouse but that doesn't mean they help with any of the care. Putting a lock on the demented, wandering elder's bedroom door at night isn't the same thing as locking them in a padded cell for days at a time. Using a posie vest to secure them in a wheelchair so they aren't getting up or sliding on the floor is not the same thing as putting them in a straight jacket. In homecare the caregiver (who is often family) also has other duties in the home. Like doing laundry, cooking, making the kid's lunches, vacuuming, etc... Sometimes they even have to go to the bathroom or just need a little break from the person. So confining them to the wheelchair in front of the tv for a little while, is perfectly fine. I can't even tell you how many times over the last 25 years that I've had to confine a client in their wheelchair or lock them in their bedroom temporarily simply because I had to go to the bathroom. Or needed a break from the elder for a little while. I would not have a client in the bathroom with me or if I stepped out to have a cigarette (back when I still smoked). Caregivers have boundaries too. When you're alone in the home with a client for hours and hours at a time, you need to have breaks from them. Common sense though.
I've never taken care of someone with dementia at home, but I'm facing the necessity soon. Everyone says "restraints" are illegal, but who is really going door-to-door in the neighborhood to see if you've restrained your elderly parent tonight? Don't people actually use some types of restraints in real life? I've seen seat-belt chairs online, where you lock the seat-belt in place and the person can't get up. Wouldn't a seat-belt chair be a good way for the caregiver to take a shower, cook a meal? Why can't you just lock dad in his bedroom at night, especially if there is a bathroom adjoining his bedroom or just a portable toilet? If you're going to fit the entire house with cameras, motion sensors, and locks on every door, why not go the extra step and have restraints?
I was an in-home caregiver for almost 25 years. Let me tell you from my long experience that there is nothing wrong with putting a lock on the outside of a bedroom door if you've got a dementia wanderer. Back in the day when I was first starting out we used to use a posie vest with a wheelchair. This secured the person in the chair so they couldn't get up or slide out of the chair and fall on the floor. It's not the same thing as a straight jacket, but everyone today is all about the "zero tolerance" nonsense which really only means zero having to think and have some common sense. Side rails up on a hospital bed aren't a bad thing either. It sure beats some elder falling out of bed onto the floor. A nursing home will put a mat on the floor next to a bed for a person who's a fall risk. Of course their risk of getting injured is far higher than if the bed rails were raised up, but they're not allowed to. Put a lock on the outside of your father's bedroom door. Put a child bar over the screen of the window so there won't be any crawling out that way. This whole thing now with cameras and senors to preserve dignity is nonsense. When an elder is at the point where they are out of it with dementia and wandering around disoriented at night they're past the point of preserving their dignity. What's important then is that they're safe and treated with kindness.
There are door alarms you can set up that are quite simple and not expensive.
If you have a deadbolt on your door ...you can do something very quickly by simply putting tape over the lever on the inside of the door. If nothing else it would slow them down if they realize they have to remove the tape first.
I had the same issue with my mom , i went to Home Depot and bought a doorknob lockout device , its a metal device you put on the inside of door and locks with a key , makes it impossible to open the door from the inside ! It has been a god sent ! Good luck
I have ring cameras in my house set up on my phone so I get an alert if any motion in my room and other rooms fit my husband. It immediately goes off and notifies me and he is not even out of our bedroom yet. Works great. Putting a person in constraints is scary, cruel and disorienting as well as dangerous. This will bring on agitation for them. At night there is “sundowners” to think of that affects their state of mind and adds to their wandering or anxiety. I put my husband down at night with s light on in the room so he is not scared. I put myself in his place and do all I can to keep him from going thru that. We could all be in this place someday and believe me it is sad and scary. I am honored to be able to take care of my husband and pray I can until his time comes.
DMadina: You are simply going to exhaust yourself physically and mentally to try to keep your dad from not wandering while living in your home. Perhaps the better option (other than hiring very expensive 24/7 x365 caregivers) is to opt for managed care facility living.
Might want to try a bookshelf door decal on the inside of exterior doors. They are used at some memory care facilities to disguise the door so residents do not try to open the doors. They cost $20 on up. They can be ordered online.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
A small slide lock placed up high on the door fixed that.
The options are:
1) Move the elder into a locked memory care facility.
2) Bring in 24-hour caregiving services into the elder's home. Or move the elder in with family. In either scenario whatever home the wandering elder is moved to every door and window has to be fitted with locks that do not open without a key. Or the elder's bedroom door has to be locked from the outside. Outside grates over the bedroom windows too if needs be.
I had an elderly client years ago who was a wanderer. She was super fit physically, but her mind was shot from dementia. She lived with her daughter who used to lock her bedroom door from the outside at night. The woman crawled out the window. I asked the daughter why she didn't put her mother's bedroom on the second floor, and it was because she would regularly crawl out of the window at night. Then some neighbor going to work or putting their kids on the bus in the morning would find her and bring her back. Or she'd knock on someone's door and say she was locked out of her house. I remember telling her that her mother getting out and potentially getting hurt wasn't the only terrible thing that could happen. There was a first-story window left open in at night that a 80-year-old could get out of. Who or what can get in? The daughter also had a husband and three kids living there. Her answer was she wasn't worried for the family because they had security cameras and the husband had a gun. She was unaware that criminals also have them and a fat lot of good a security camera does when everyone is sound asleep.
One morning I was heading to their house and I found her walking up the sidewalk in nothing but a soiled Depend and a t-shirt. I called her daughter to come and pick her up because I would not put her in my car. I was able tptalk them into getting metal security grates put over the first-floor windows in her mother's bedroom. They only agreed because I told them that I'm obligated to report the incident to the police and APS but that I wouldn't if they got it done. They had child safety locks put that day and then the grates. Sure the mother was angry because she was literally locked down at night like jail.
It was that or go to memory care. Those are about the only two choices.
https://www.amazon.com/Security-Childproof-Reinforcement-Withstand-Nightlock/dp/B07MG4KR7G was put on the front door.
She was an enfeebled old women who couldn't reach it. But it might also confound an elderly male with dementia, because it is hard to open even if you do know how to open it, especially if it is out of easy reach.
Another possibility is a deadbolt lock that locks from the inside. You could tell your parent that you are afraid of crime and are upgrading your security.
The door in my Moms area was a round knob. I bought child protective covers. For Mom, they just went round and round. For me, I knew the trick needed to open them.
How about making sure the person who is out of it enough with dementia that they need to be locked in doesn't have any access to matches or lighters. I'd say even check them for for a pieces of flint also just to be safe. Pat them down for drugs and weapons too before locking the door.
Let's be honest here about dignity issues. Many people find the locking in to be one. When the elder's dementia has progressed to where they have to either be watched 24 hours a day like a toddler or locked in, they really have no dignity. At this point the goal is really keeping them safe and being kind to them.
I've worked for many seniors who had a good life with their family at home. They were locked in their room at night when it was bedtime. No one slept in there with them. Most people aren't millionaires so it's absolutely ridiculous to pay a babysitter to sit there all night so they don't wander off. A family can buy a $20 baby monitor at Target and $10 lock at any hardware store and install it on the outside of the door. Problem solved in many instances.
I can't see how it's better for an elderly person or their family they live with to put them in memory care if everyone is happy having them and they're being cared for by family.
I've taken more than a few people to the store to buy door locks for grandma/grandpa's bedroom and even installed a few myself.
a pad under his sheets or on the floor that will set of an alert in your room when he moves off his bed
oh..and if he's wandering, make sure he cannot access the kitchen. lock that door if there is a door to lock. Otherwise disable the microwave and oven, lock the fridge, lock the cabinets, lock the drawers, etc.
I don’t think anyone else has mentioned this consideration, but I have found a few other things have helped my father’s wandering. Essentially, those two things are regulating his sleep and adjusting his medications. The dr had to adjust his medications several times to get the combinations correct so that he sleeps most all of the night. When I took over his care upon my mother’s passing (we have no other family and I, by the grace of God, became eligible to retire early six weeks later), I found that he was allowed to sleep a great deal during the day so he was not sleepy at night. Later during his care, I found that some sitters were allowing him to take long naps during the day (I have him about 130 of the 168 hours each week because I recognized early on that I would not be able mentally or physically to care for him 24-7 for very long). After I explained to the sitters what it does to him when he cannot sleep at night, they got better and his nighttime wandering almost stopped.
I hope this information is helpful, because I know what it is like to have to deal with wandering.
Your internet/phone carrier can put a sensor on the door. A camera will face the door. Should your loved one "escape" a text will go off with a photo. Keep the phone next to your bed.
This feature cost about $20 per month. You can do a lot of add-ons with these things. How about some type of deadbolt that is not easily accessed on the main door to the house NOT the bedroom door.
I read an article where there some device if you turn the doorknob an alarm goes off. Has anyone heard of this?
We need to keep our loved one's "safe" but not feel imprisoned. They need to be protected and a lot of these gadgets you can go online for the latest. Your local hardware store can assist you.
I would contact your neighbors and local police so they will be aware should your dad wander. I have an ID that I am going to put on my mother when we go grocery shopping should my mother wander.
Youcan also put a movement sensor in his room. They are inexpensive and the alarm can be in your room.
Amazon.com: Improved Childproof Door Lever Lock (2 Pack) Prevents Toddlers From Opening Doors. Easy One Hand Operation for Adults. Durable ABS with 3M Adhesive Backing. Simple Install, No Tools Needed (White, 2) : Baby
That being said many people resort to: bed alarms, cameras, motion activated lighting and alarms, cameras ( all over the place), monitors with visual and sound.
" Restraints" are against the law...
Speak with Physician and others for guidance on what is your responsibility, accountability, expectations, liabilities etc etc re having such a " high risk" patient in the home.
Practice good self care....you're gonna need it !
Best regards. jnm
Nursing home/facility rules don't apply in a person's home.
When a family member moves a loved one with dementia into their home they assume the responsibility for their care and safety. There's not a full care staff on duty 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. It's usually only one person. Maybe two if they've got a spouse but that doesn't mean they help with any of the care.
Putting a lock on the demented, wandering elder's bedroom door at night isn't the same thing as locking them in a padded cell for days at a time.
Using a posie vest to secure them in a wheelchair so they aren't getting up or sliding on the floor is not the same thing as putting them in a straight jacket.
In homecare the caregiver (who is often family) also has other duties in the home. Like doing laundry, cooking, making the kid's lunches, vacuuming, etc... Sometimes they even have to go to the bathroom or just need a little break from the person. So confining them to the wheelchair in front of the tv for a little while, is perfectly fine.
I can't even tell you how many times over the last 25 years that I've had to confine a client in their wheelchair or lock them in their bedroom temporarily simply because I had to go to the bathroom. Or needed a break from the elder for a little while. I would not have a client in the bathroom with me or if I stepped out to have a cigarette (back when I still smoked). Caregivers have boundaries too. When you're alone in the home with a client for hours and hours at a time, you need to have breaks from them. Common sense though.
I was an in-home caregiver for almost 25 years. Let me tell you from my long experience that there is nothing wrong with putting a lock on the outside of a bedroom door if you've got a dementia wanderer.
Back in the day when I was first starting out we used to use a posie vest with a wheelchair. This secured the person in the chair so they couldn't get up or slide out of the chair and fall on the floor. It's not the same thing as a straight jacket, but everyone today is all about the "zero tolerance" nonsense which really only means zero having to think and have some common sense.
Side rails up on a hospital bed aren't a bad thing either. It sure beats some elder falling out of bed onto the floor. A nursing home will put a mat on the floor next to a bed for a person who's a fall risk. Of course their risk of getting injured is far higher than if the bed rails were raised up, but they're not allowed to.
Put a lock on the outside of your father's bedroom door. Put a child bar over the screen of the window so there won't be any crawling out that way.
This whole thing now with cameras and senors to preserve dignity is nonsense. When an elder is at the point where they are out of it with dementia and wandering around disoriented at night they're past the point of preserving their dignity. What's important then is that they're safe and treated with kindness.
If you have a deadbolt on your door ...you can do something very quickly by simply putting tape over the lever on the inside of the door. If nothing else it would slow them down if they realize they have to remove the tape first.