I would appreciate your advice for the following;
My Dad is living in his own after my mother died, he does not want to move to our place and he is getting alone by himself not to mention he needs help in home.
I found a nice family living in the neighborhood who is a war refugee from Syria, and they offred their services to take care of the household as well as my father for a small amount of money.
I am not sure what to do !!
I am interested to hear your perception about it.
How is the caregiver's English? Does you dad understand him/her?
Would your father's home become their residence? Be aware that if you needed to sell you father's home (either because he needs the money for a higher level of care, or because he passes away) they would, in some jurisdictions, have to be evicted if they did not leave willingly.
Are there any cultural differences that would interfere? Can they cook the foods your father enjoys? Do they have young children?
Lots of questions to answer, which only you can do.
In general, I tend to favor Elders who can no longer live alone going to places where there are other elders. This is in part informed by the loneliness that my grandmother endured when she lived with us when we were kids. She would have so benefitted from having friends of her own age around.
I also think that, as in day care, vs a nanny, more eyes on an elder is a good policy. There is always a chance, when an elder is home alone with a caregiver, that that person begins to exert undue influence. The elder becomes trained to think that they will be abandoned to the streets if the caregiver leaves and all sorts of mischief, very often financial abuse, occurs.
they are an educated family, apparently their social status in their country was good. The wife makes an amazing food, they invited me twice already to their place by chance.
they are looking to mix more in the community also they are trying to make reduce their living cost.
They looks like nice family, though I am hesitant to make a decision..
If he's willing, set up a house account that he draws from rather than his regular account (to protect everyone -- the Syrian family may not be hip to scams).
I think that when we are concerned about a loved one, we want to do whatever will help, sometimes ignoring red flags. It sounds like something I would not do, simply because there are so many things that could go wrong and then you have all kinds of matters do deal with. You could end up in court spending lots of money on legal fees just to get this family out of your house if things don't work out well. If you do proceed, I would see and attorney about a contract to protect your dad. Explore who needs to sign the contract. You, dad or both?
What happens if you discover they have moved other people into the house? What if they have pets who are aggressive? What if they become uncooperative and are no help to your dad? What if they leave suddenly and leave your dad without support? What if they destroy property or do something illegal? The list goes on as to why it's problematic.
Whatever you chose, I hope it works out. For the right family, it could be a great setup.
I'm a bit skeptical, wondering why the family couldn't take care of him from their own home.
In addition to what others have written, it's prudent to be aware of the trauma and sometimes PTSD experienced by war refugees. They've probably been bombed out of their homes, fled under duress, suffered incredibly just to escape, and have learned some refugee survival techniques that might not always be consistent with taking care of someone else.
How long have they been here? What routes did they take to escape? Were they assisted by political factions, or international groups? Do they still have relatives in Syria and are the relatives also attempting to escape? If the latter, it wouldn't be unusual to bring over the family and move them in.
I think the idea of a trial is good, testing out the situation while they're living in their own place.
I also would take any valuable possessions, including guns, and important documents, and also set up financial arrangements that you can handle so there's nothing personal that could be accessed if they move in.
In the meantime, ask your local PD if you can get a background check. You want to make sure as Army said that they're legal, but also that they're not involved in any political factions and are fudging their background.
They may be perfectly innocent and very good people, but do find out what you can about them, hopefully with the help of the local PD, or if you have to, ask them directly about doing a credit check. They may not even have a credit file, but I keep wondering why they're wiling to provide services for a small amount of money yet still want to move in.
To be living in your father's home (if I understand the proposed arrangement) would be to literally get free room and board, and I think even a rough estimate of their services vs. their gratuities needs to be addressed.
I think also that I'd check with an immigration attorney who might have some suggestions on verifying their background.
Something to remember is that some of the refugees were literally stripped of their professional careers by the political regime. I would wonder if these people are still thinking about trying to get back into their prior professions, and what would happen to your father's caregiving needs then.
Maybe they seem like a good people...Find something else to make sure you do
the right things for you father! Be careful. Good luck!