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My mom has now been in MC for almost 2 years this August (2022). She has moderate Vascular Dementia. From the very beginning, I would pick her up and take her to lunch, to my house, the mall, and Dr. visits. It became a normal for her. The staff even knew she needed to get out MC for awhile. I know everyone means well, but remember every person suffering from dementia is different. Just yesterday, I picked her up, we got an ice cream cone, and we went for a country drive. That lifted her spirits; to get out in the fresh spring air. She returned to MC content with the staff asking if she had a good time. The staff never have a problem with her after outings. I think each person with dementia handles this differently, but I just wanted to say this for those who wonder if their loved one could handle getting out once in awhile. It probably helped that I started doing this right from the start, when it was allowed throughout Covid times. In my mom's situation, this is what keeps her upbeat. She gets down when she's cooped up for weeks.

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I agree that there tends to be a lot of black and white thinking on the forum. The advice people give is heavily influenced by their personal experience and although it may have worked for them it often isn't relevant for those in different situations. I'm glad you are able to take your mom out for enjoyable outings!
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Your mom is blessed to have you. My mother spent four years in a NH under different circumstances. Taking her out was extremely cumbersome as she couldn’t help at all with any transfers. But she so enjoyed a change of scenery. She loved every outing from just going for a ride, to visiting her beloved home, to attending a ballet recital and a graduation for grandchildren. It was well worth the trouble to have her happy for a bit during such impossibly trying times. I’m glad you’re doing this with your mom and hope it continues to be enjoyable for you both
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You have a great situation with your mom & are fortunate to be able to take her out. Most people here asking these questions about taking their parent out of MC are asking about taking them back to their home for a visit, which can bring up emotions and them not wanting to return back to the MC. Many times an elder can't even be taken off the MC premises for those reasons, but not always, as you've pointed out.

No situation is the same for everyone, that's for sure. Thanks for sharing your perspective and kudos to you for getting mom out & about after being cooped up for weeks! So glad it works well for both of you, that's a blessing.
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People relate their own experiences, so that's what you've done. Glad it works for you, and that your mother isn't incontinent. That's what brought our outings to an end.
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That's wonderful that these outings work so well for you.

Spending time together, somewhere different can bring a little fun & excitement to both of you ☺️☺️

For others, they need the routine & familiar territory to feel safe. Outings cause them & their caregiver much stress, so better avoid.

I have not been able to take my LO out myself for a long time - due to mobility, continance (lack of, 2x) & behaviour issues. It was nice to spend some time in the fresh air, doing something different... but needs increased too much. She does goes out but requires arranged carer/aide (other than me) + equipment etc. I don't know of she has the insight to realise why I stopped.
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You are blessed to have this situation...I hope it continues for a long time!
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Yes ur blessed. But Mom is in moderate stages. There may come a time when these outings become scary for her. My Mom was good for about an hour. She was in the later stages when I placed her in an AL. Only time I took her out was for appts. She was a fall risk.
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I wish my mom had kept walking to the dining room for her meals.Now that the hard Wisconsin winter is passed, I know an ice cream Sunday , and a drive around would do her good. I don’t know how I could get her in and out of the car…
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lealonnie1 Apr 2022
That's what happened with my mother; when she became wheelchair bound, it became impossible to get her in & out of our car, even with my DH doing all of the heavy lifting. She was 190 lbs and DH had to lift her legs FOR her, in and out of the car, etc. It was just too much so we had to dx the outings. Before that, when she was able to stand a bit/help with her legs, we did take her out to dinner 2x a month and she loved it. Why not bring mom an ice cream sundae? That's what we'd do all the time, and she enjoyed the treats. We'd bring her Kentucky Fried chicken and McDonald's too, which were her favorites. Also, Blue Bunny puts out some REALLY good frozen ice cream sundaes in cups (several different flavors) you can buy at WalMart and bring to her that would stay frozen longer:

https://www.walmart.com/ip/Blue-Bunny-Load-d-Sundaes-Chocolate-Brownie-Bomb-Cup/234708951?wmlspartner=wlpa
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I take my stepmother out for lunch every 2-3 weeks. She had Front Temporal, fading fast, hardly talks anymore, no way to converse with her, so I do all the talking! Don't know if it helps or not, no indication, one way or the other.

Half the time I go to pick her up I find her in the dining room eating, call her when I leave home to remind her, she forgets in that short of time, like 1/2 hour.
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