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I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
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V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
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I'd have him checked for depression. There seems to be a lack of caring for himself here. The showering is something that can happen when other senses go, or when dementia is present. He needs to be checked by his doctor and maybe that doctor can great him for depression, if he feels that is the issue. Once depression is treated right (this can take some trial and error) he may be more willing to get other things done. Carol
Did you mean 6 MONTHS or 6 DAY? 6 months I would think a person would wreak of not smelling good at all. Especially older folks they get a bit more ahem stinkier. My mom doesn't like bathing anymore either and that is just a recent development...what cracks me up is her caregiver has that as the first thing on the agenda...LOL. So the caregivers have ways to make them bathe. But this is what I did with my mom, just say okay mom/dad I am going to give you a nice bath and we will wash your hair, start getting your clothes off...and then start the bath with very warm water and very nice smelling bath bubbles. Perhaps once you get it started it may intrigue him to get in. Or if the bath is out...you could try it with the shower..get the shower nice and warm and steamy and again get a nice sponge full of that shower gel stuff. Let us know what happens!!!
I have trouble getting my husband to shower. I understand there are many reasons people with Alzheimer's don't like to bathe. Sometimes they have forgotten how to turn on the water, etc, and that is embarassing. Sometimes the experience is uncomfortable.,,the water hitting their skin is painful. Often they just forget. Sometimes my husband thinks he has had a shower. Before the "rare showers" phase, he took many showers...two or three a day. I believe that he forgot he had taken one at that time...now he forgets that he has not. I try to tie the shower to something he wants to do...as in..."we can go out for a snack after your shower." This works sometimes. Also, just beiing persistent helps. If he is averse to a shower I will sometimes drop it to avoid nagging him. This does annoy him. I just keep trying at different times, and sometimes "the stars just line up properly" and he agrees. Once he gets in the shower, he seems to enjoy it...but that doesn't make him want to do it more often. I wish you success.
I have called in people that do this for a living , so I don`t have to be the bad daughter by giving my mom the " wicked " shower. The first time it was a little tough but this week she had her second and things went allot better. Good Luck.
Tying the shower or bath in with something they want to do is often effective, unless they are at a stage where they are actually afraid of the shower. But this is a really good strategy, Viola. Keep us posted. Carol
marilynjean1200, have you tried a simple wash cloth wipe down, daily? I help my parent shower daily, and always offer the option for a wash cloth clean up in lieu of shower. It ensures that my parent is the one in control of showering, or not, but I can see that some days it is the equivalent of cutting a chronically ill person some slack. I use warm water on the cloth, which I have pre-soaked with some rubbing alcohol or menthol alcohol for minor aches and pains. Head-to-toe, followed by towel drying, then body lotion. Baby wipes for sensitive skin areas, separate face splash, and all's well that ends well. It may be that you start by only doing a back wipe down to avoid your Dad becoming agitated. I am assuming, of course, that he at least takes off his day clothes to change into pj's at night? If he does not, start with just helping him by changing his shirt, then tell him you see his skin is dry and you're just going to wipe his back down a little then add some lotion. Rather than taking him fast-forward, help him adjust to your helping him take his shirt off. Or, start with his face, and a nice warm wash cloth around his jaw using your cupped hands...and a smile. If it's been 6 months, just take tiny steps to help get him to where he needs to be. That, plus medical evaluation as soon as you can schedule an appointment for him. I agree with the advice others have shared with you.
pa doesnt shower anymore , i wash him down real good while he s sittin on the toilet , at least he dont smell . but smells like a baby , using johnson shampoo bath soap . he feels better , when i make him take a shower oh lord behold hes crying wa wa waaa and then i have a hard time with him . so i dont do that anymore . sit on toilet pa im gonna wash ya down . he dont make a sound .
Thanks for your advices. But dad says he dont need shower that things are great just the way things are. He dont need shower and he will take care of his own private things himself. He says he dont like being told what to do. Thanks Marilyn
Is he not bathing because he is afraid of getting in the tub? You can get a shower chair. Is he still afraid to use the chair, then don't, a bath can be given while sitting on the toilet or on the bed. If he doesn't want anyone to touch him, then it's best that someone who does caregiving do it. If he resists a caregiver, his doctor could write a prescription for a caregiver/home health aide (and there are male ones) to come in for him.
Viola, if my husband ever gets to the place where he will no longer take showers, I am going to tell him we'll shower together. I guarantee, that he'll be taking a shower then. ha.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Carol
Carol
he feels better , when i make him take a shower oh lord behold hes crying wa wa waaa and then i have a hard time with him .
so i dont do that anymore . sit on toilet pa im gonna wash ya down . he dont make a sound .