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FIL rarely washes his hands. Has been living with myself and husband for 3 years when his wife passed. He is 90 years old with several health issues, including Parkinson’s, but is able to ambulate with a cane and take care of other hygiene measures, including brushing teeth, shaving, showers and dressing/undressing self. He can feed himself / checks and records daily vitals and weight. Has his own bathroom. I will hear the flushing of the toilet but will not hear water running afterwards. have checked soap dispenser, bar soap, sink, towel, and all appeared to be unused. I have left alcohol type cleansers, and those appear unused. I have seen him wash his hands before dinner at kitchen sink but not routinely. When confronted, he claims that he is washing his hands with bar soap. Became almost angry when I had that brief conversation - thoughts?

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You may consider leaving a note or message near the places you want him to wash his hands. Symptoms of Parkinson’s can sometimes show cognitive irregularity or even mimic depression or dementia. There are neurological effects that can also be affected as well. You can also check out the American Parkinson’s Association if you would like additional details about signs and symptoms of the condition.
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Reply to Senior8
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If he can check and record his daily vitals and weight, he can wash his hands.
"Get back in there and wash your hands!"
Get the bar soap out of the bathroom so he can't say he used it.
Supervise his handwashing.
Send him to assisted living.

You can tell I've had a bad day with my Mom.
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Reply to Lylii1
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The individual wipes is a very good idea and I'd also like to mention that your father-in-laws nails should be kept very short.
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Reply to Hrmgrandcna
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I read your profile and you said your husband is the primary caregiver. If the handwashing is too difficult, he can buy Purell wipes in individual packets, and open and hand one to FIL whenever he comes back from the bathroom. You can get them at CVS, Walmart, Target, etc. or order in bulk online.
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Reply to MG8522
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Time for DH to be there after Dad uses the bathroom to make sure he uses soap and water.
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Reply to JoAnn29
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If he has dementia he probably needs assistance with washing his hands on a regular basis.
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Reply to JustAnon
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According to your profile, Robert has dementia. People with dementia cannot be reasoned with, so if you want him to wash his hands, you'll have to supervise him doing it. Things will only get worse from here, so you may want to talk to DH about placing your FIL in Memory Care Assisted Living when his behavior and hygiene become unmanageable for you at home.

Good luck to you.
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Reply to lealonnie1
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This is something your husband should address firmly with him, man-to-man. He should tell him that this is a health issue for all three of you and that verification is possible, as you've mentioned.

Bigger picture: do you want him to continue living with you? Meaning, is it just this one issue that's bothering you and if it's resolved you'll be happy, or is it kind of a "last-straw" or "situation becoming too much" symptom?
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Reply to MG8522
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