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I've been taking care of a gentleman for over 8 years. Due to no support emotionally, I finally had a mental breakdown.  Anyone and everyone is pointing the finger at me and all I wished through this was for someone to ask me what they could do to help. He will most likely end up in a nursing home. I feel I have no rights to keep my promise to him to keep him at home.

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Who is this person to you, exactly? And how did it come to pass that you became caregiver?

Really, if his care has become such a burden to you that you are suffering physically and mentally, then the best place for him is in a facility. His care isn't going to become easier as time moves on.
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Reply to notgoodenough
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I'm sorry for your breakdown. But it does prove that your promise to him was unrealistic, and it was unfair of him to ask it of you. So please let him go to a nursing home, where he will receive the care he needs, and so that you can recuperate and recover your mental and physical health. What is your relationship to him? Has he provided financially for you in exchange for the care you provided? Ignore the people pointing fingers. What matters is both your and his safety and health, and the nursing home is the solution for both.
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Reply to MG8522
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You have done more than enough for this gentleman .
You need to take care of yourself now.
You don’t say if anyone has POA or who is actually responsible for this man.
Whoever that is needs to place him in a nursing home ASAP.
You can call the local County Area Agency of Aging and ask for a social worker to assist with placement .

Obtain a doctor’s note that you are no longer able to be a caregiver for this man . Let the social worker deal with finding him help.
And ignore those pointing fingers who are not willing to help. They have no right to judge.
Perhaps the social worker can also point you in the direction of another social worker for you to help you readjust , find a place to live if you need etc.
Follow up with your doctor and see a therapist as well .
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Reply to waytomisery
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You go on by now taking care of your physical and mental health as without either you are absolutely no good to anyone. especially yourself.
You've paid a very high price to try and keep your promise to this gentleman and I do hope that you've learned your lesson not to ever do that again going forward, as you matter too.
So please take good care of yourself now and let the chips fall where they may with this gentleman. And remember when someone is pointing a finger at you that there are 3 fingers pointing back at them. So just ignore those fools.
I wish you well in your healing.
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Reply to funkygrandma59
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