My father in law and mother in law are still married but she insisted he move out to an apartment 15 years ago because he started hoarding. His apartment is completely unlivable. There are rodents, it is filled with junk and the smell is unbearable. He has funds but refuses to spend any money, living on one meal a day at the senior center. When we broach the subject of him moving into a place he says no. We just want to pick him up and take him to a care facility so he can live the end of his days with dignity. What do we do? Mom is 90 and so sad, she is not healthy or strong enough to be his guardian. I appreciate all advice on what we can do in this very sad situation.
Also the rodent infestation — would your county (or county he lives in) be interested in that as well? Maybe report this situation to as many entities as possible.
he can’t hear his phone and probably wouldn’t answer. As far as we know, they never came by.We have been told repeatedly if he doesn’t want help, we cannot force it. He definitely has dementia at this point, it’s getting worse the last few months. The property manager also did a walk thru and said nothing! It is completely infested with rats!
Hopefully that "incident" will happen sooner than later.
However, if he is renting an apartment, the Apartment management should be alerted to the condition of his unit. They may want to take action and call local authorities or evict him. His apartment poses a safety hazard to his neighbors, himself, and creates a possible liability for the owner/management if he or anyone is hurt or exposed to an unhealthy living environment.
In the unlikely event the apartment manager chooses not to take any action, then you could call APS (Adult Protective Services). It is unfortunate for him that he will need to move and let go of all his stuff. I've seen people on "Hoarders" break down emotionally. He will need a lot of non-judgemental support. I hope you and others will be able to provide that for him.