Are you sure you want to exit? Your progress will be lost.
Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
✔
I acknowledge and authorize
✔
I consent to the collection of my consumer health data.*
✔
I consent to the sharing of my consumer health data with qualified home care agencies.*
*If I am consenting on behalf of someone else, I have the proper authorization to do so. By clicking Get My Results, you agree to our Privacy Policy. You also consent to receive calls and texts, which may be autodialed, from us and our customer communities. Your consent is not a condition to using our service. Please visit our Terms of Use. for information about our privacy practices.
Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
Do you feel as though you've done something wrong? We're you motivated by greed, avarice or sloth?
I think a lot of us feel as though we ought to be able to care for our elderly parents at home. It looks so easy when the Waltons did it.
The truth is, one might be able to care for a frail but mentally clear elder at home. Dementia is a game changer. Caring for a dementia patient requires three shifts of well rested caregivers who go home to a night's rest.
Dear lady, please forgive yourself for getting your mother into a good caregiving situation. Visit her as her loving daughter and advocate. Dont worry, there is still plenty or work for you to do.
I see you were posting about your mom two years ago. You hung in there a LONG time. You were doing the work of three shifts of people, who could go home and rest for 16 hours until their shift started again. Only you never got that rest. You were "on" 24-7. You were human and you could only take so much.
Now your mom is in a place with three shifts of people to care for her. You can still visit her and advocate for her. But you can let the professionals do the day-to-day care. Now you can focus on bringing her a little flower or a bright card. You can spend time with her doing what she likes to do. It's can be better for both of you, because you can go back to being her daughter and not her nurse and maid and chauffeur.
So try to understand you're only human. You can still see your mom and love her just as much as when she lived with you. She's safe and being cared for by professionals. Hugs to you - you deserve them!
Guilt feelings go with caregiving. I don't think there is a sure-fire escape. If you kept her with you and realized she needed something you couldn't supply, you'd feel guilty about that. If she fell at home, you'd feel guilty about that.
The trick is to push that unearned guilt feeling way to the back of your mind, and don't let it interfere with making the best decisions you can.
Or ... it may not really be guilt you are feeling. It may be a combination of other things that we don't quite have a word for. Regret that Mom is now at this point in her disease; fear and anger over not being able to control the situation; unhappiness at being faced with the unknown. Lots of uncomfortable unfeelings, but not really guilt, because you are an intelligent and sensible woman and logically understand that this is Not Your Fault.
You say "I finally had to place" so that means you've exhausted all other options. Which sounds to me like you tried your best to not put her in a nursing home. Am I right? Sounds like a great deal of love to me. You have nothing to feel guilty for. Give your self a break.
Hi MRSCBS123 : We Carer's care for Our love One's because We really love Them. You have given Your all towards caring for Your Mother, but It's time now for Professional's Nurse's and Doctor's, Physiotherapist's, and Carer's to look after Your Mum. None of Us wish to hand over Our Love One, but I've been made aware that this time will come to Me too, where by I will eventually have to let go and have My own Mother Who suffers from Al/s with 21/2 years, admitted to an Alzheimer's facility. We can only do Our very best MRSCBS123, and bring Those We love and Care for so far. Free Yourself of guilt feelings, because You have been a wonderful Daughter to Your Mum, and You will be Blessed.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
I think a lot of us feel as though we ought to be able to care for our elderly parents at home. It looks so easy when the Waltons did it.
The truth is, one might be able to care for a frail but mentally clear elder at home. Dementia is a game changer. Caring for a dementia patient requires three shifts of well rested caregivers who go home to a night's rest.
Dear lady, please forgive yourself for getting your mother into a good caregiving situation. Visit her as her loving daughter and advocate. Dont worry, there is still plenty or work for you to do.
Now your mom is in a place with three shifts of people to care for her. You can still visit her and advocate for her. But you can let the professionals do the day-to-day care. Now you can focus on bringing her a little flower or a bright card. You can spend time with her doing what she likes to do. It's can be better for both of you, because you can go back to being her daughter and not her nurse and maid and chauffeur.
So try to understand you're only human. You can still see your mom and love her just as much as when she lived with you. She's safe and being cared for by professionals. Hugs to you - you deserve them!
The trick is to push that unearned guilt feeling way to the back of your mind, and don't let it interfere with making the best decisions you can.
Or ... it may not really be guilt you are feeling. It may be a combination of other things that we don't quite have a word for. Regret that Mom is now at this point in her disease; fear and anger over not being able to control the situation; unhappiness at being faced with the unknown. Lots of uncomfortable unfeelings, but not really guilt, because you are an intelligent and sensible woman and logically understand that this is Not Your Fault.
Which sounds to me like you tried your best to not put her in a nursing home. Am I right? Sounds like a great deal of love to me. You have nothing to feel guilty for.
Give your self a break.