I posted a question earlier and got the response that it was Capgras Syndrome, which fits his behavior to a tee. When I answer questions truthfully.... like where was I born, do I have any children, etc., my husband doesn't like that they are the same answers that the "real wife" would have. Should I continue answering truthfully or make up some other persona so he doesn't get upset? Frequently, he thinks I am a hired caregiver, or cleaning lady. When he thinks that, he is asking questions to have polite conversation because 'he doesn't know anything about me'. Sometimes he has periods when you knows who I am and tells me about these other women impersonating me. I just don't know how to navigate this. I have a referral to neuro at a local university hospital by my PCP and I know they have support for caregivers but the appointment isn't until October. Any help is greatly appreciated.
Validate feelings (without agreeing to the delusion):
“That sounds really upsetting.”
“I can see this is worrying you.”
“You’re safe. I’m here with you.”
(You’re validating the emotion, not the belief)
Reassure, gently by redirecting the conversation:
“I'm here to help you.”
“Everything’s okay right now.”
“You’re not alone.”
Distraction:
“Let’s have some coffee.”
“Can you help me with this?”
“Let’s sit down together for a bit.”
(Shift his focus rather than trying to “fix” the belief)
I'm sorry you are going through this. I hope this helps!
It may be quicker to get in to see a neurologist with your local hospital system than one with a research hospital; keep the appointment there since they tend to have more specialized expertise, but see if you can get to another neurologist in the meantime who can help you with the diagnosis and medication.
I know this must be emotionally draining and I hope you find some solutions soon.