Are you sure you want to exit? Your progress will be lost.
Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
✔
I acknowledge and authorize
✔
I consent to the collection of my consumer health data.*
✔
I consent to the sharing of my consumer health data with qualified home care agencies.*
*If I am consenting on behalf of someone else, I have the proper authorization to do so. By clicking Get My Results, you agree to our Privacy Policy. You also consent to receive calls and texts, which may be autodialed, from us and our customer communities. Your consent is not a condition to using our service. Please visit our Terms of Use. for information about our privacy practices.
Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
Therapeutic lie. My friend had to place his mother in a memory care facility. He told his mother that water main work was going to be done out in the street and the water needed to be shut off for a few days.
She went willingly to memory care. And adjusted very well.
Support the therapy lie. We are telling my husband that his doctor ordered him to a private hospital for long term observation because he is concerned about side effects from all the meds he has to take. The people at the "private hospital" are in on the story and, hopefully, with his severely limited cognition, it will work until he accepts the status quo.
Do you live with them? Do they live by themselves?
Are you their PoA?
Why is it short notice?
You can tell them a therapeutic fib about why they are moving ("It's temporary because the house needs repairs") but if your LO has short-term memory issues then what you tell them may not matter if they don't remember it.
Pack a suitcase with about 2 weeks worth of clothes and don't let them know. My mistake was I asked mom to pack and all she did was drag out papers and pictures and everything else under the sun! She bagged up trash bags full of clothes and blocked the pathway for the movers. My brother actually accused me of trashing the place!! It was the dementia that did everything but pack a suitcase. If possible, bring the relative to lunch at the new facility and yes,therapeutic lie,pretend you have an emergency and they need to "check in" . In the meantime, the facility may be able to keep the relative occupied while you move their belongings in. Say, this place is able to take you in and they even went as far as to bring things from your home for you, how nice! Hopefully,the relative likes the new accommodations and adjusts. Give the situation the recommended couple of weeks for adjustment before telling the relative they couldn't fix the issue with the home and they have to stay on there. Dementia is very tricky but easy to get around with little white fibs.
As a caregiver I would take the client/patient out to lunch and shopping while the family did the move. We could show up at the care facility when this was completed. The facility staff will be helpful at bringing them to an activity or meeting to break the news. It was easier for me to be the Bad guy" than family. The amount or type of fabrication will depend on her awareness.
A friend of mine had to move his mom with dementia on very short notice. He said the less buildup, the better. He told her they were just going out for lunch, and then brought her straight to the care home. It was emotional for him, but she actually settled in much smoother than when he used to try explaining too much ahead of time. He also set up her room with familiar photos and a blanket, which helped a lot. He told me the hardest part was giving her a few days to adjust before visiting, but that really made the transition easier for her.
Hoo boy. I may be facing this scenario soon. However, my 90yo mother with dementia is also relentlessly suspicious that everyone is always lying to her about everything, and frequently acidly remarks that we “just want to dump her in a prison somewhere.” So no therapeutic fib is gonna fly. Other thoughts?? :-(
You re-create their new room to resemble their own / known room as much as possible. Photos on the dresser ... their dresser in the new room.
If that doesn't work, you tell them ... 1. it is temporary while you are getting their room painted or getting the toilet fixed. 2. It is just for a few tests so you'll feel better.
You tell them anything that leaves them with HOPE ...
Sharing more of what your concerns are could help us respond with more useful support / ideas.
Someone thought you were asking about actual transportation (and perhaps you are - ?)
How are you feeling about this? What is the level of dementia? Who is this person, a spouse? Tell us more.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
She went willingly to memory care. And adjusted very well.
How old is your relative?
What stage of dementia are they in?
Do you live with them? Do they live by themselves?
Are you their PoA?
Why is it short notice?
You can tell them a therapeutic fib about why they are moving ("It's temporary because the house needs repairs") but if your LO has short-term memory issues then what you tell them may not matter if they don't remember it.
If possible, bring the relative to lunch at the new facility and yes,therapeutic lie,pretend you have an emergency and they need to "check in" . In the meantime, the facility may be able to keep the relative occupied while you move their belongings in. Say, this place is able to take you in and they even went as far as to bring things from your home for you, how nice! Hopefully,the relative likes the new accommodations and adjusts. Give the situation the recommended couple of weeks for adjustment before telling the relative they couldn't fix the issue with the home and they have to stay on there. Dementia is very tricky but easy to get around with little white fibs.
If that doesn't work, you tell them ...
1. it is temporary while you are getting their room painted or getting the toilet fixed.
2. It is just for a few tests so you'll feel better.
You tell them anything that leaves them with HOPE ...
Sharing more of what your concerns are could help us respond with more useful support / ideas.
Someone thought you were asking about actual transportation (and perhaps you are - ?)
How are you feeling about this? What is the level of dementia?
Who is this person, a spouse?
Tell us more.
Gena / Touch Matters