My mother turned 93 yesterday. For the past 9 months I have been trying to get her a valid ID. I have her birth certificate, her very first SS card, both her marriage certificates and bills etc with her current address. Unfortunately, the name on her birth certificate and her first SS card are not the name she has gone by all these years and it is really complicated. She always went by her middle name, which she didn't spell as it was on her BC. Then after marrying her name changed and she used that name for all her job related documents and her SS benefits and her DL. They can't make a chain to connect her birth name to her current name using all the documents. If I could get a current SS card, it shows the same number as her original with the name she uses now, but I have spent months trying to get a copy of her SS card. They won't even talk to me (very rudely, I'll add) at the SS office unless I have a "current valid ID". Wouldn't even listen to me as to why it makes sense just to check her SS record. She isn't able to collect my dad's SS benefit (higher than hers) after his death a month ago and I'm afraid we will face the same problem in getting his pension benefit which he chose spousal benefit upon his retirement. What can I do? Would an attorney be able to help me?
I was trying to get my Mom certified with the TSA for flights. It turns out her NYC birth certificate is only a "verification" that they have her BC on file. She also decided to place fast and loose with her last name and it has created some havoc. I could barely get a duplicate car title because of her name mess. Thankfully, the state of MN said it is ok to use her now cancelled driver's license as her valid ID in instances where it is required.
Because I got married in the early 80s and was in business with my husband, I started to hyphenate my last name (which was a trend) or just go by my maiden name, which is not how it appears on my marriage license. Almost all of our important business documents show my name and signatures incorrectly. Fortunately we are practically retired and it won't be an issue winding down our business.
BUT after the problems with my Mom's name issues I went back and made as many changes for my legal name consistency as possible. I made sure my SS card reflected the name on my marriage license, and it matched my DL and passport.
I urge anyone else to do the same: make sure your legal name is as it appears on your marriage license, driver's license, and SS card. You won't regret it.
When your LO passes, the funeral home will need to know the legal name, or else they will have to be known as AKA ("also known as") which may also create some challenges.