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We are 81 and need to move from our large home into a more manageable space. We do Not want to be boxed into assisted living quarters but do need some assistance .
independent living communities look good.
We prefer to pay monthly for a villa rather than upfront
or to buy outright & pay for services
We have a dog!
We are accustomed to nice things and it will be difficult to accept anything lesser. Things like high ceilings , views.
Also tax friendly tax laws for elders.
Add to that, we have no desired location Except it must be a cooler
climate (not hot like Florida)
We currently live in Western NC blue ridge mountain area. NC especially further North
is a good possibility.
Is there a service specific to advising people where to move and what type community would be appropriate?
Any help from the forum is much appreciated.
thank You!

Search for a Continuing Care Community. I am a 69yr widow and sold my 3000sq ft home 2 yrs ago. I purchased a brand new cottage in a Continuing Care Community, chose the floor plan and all finishes (flooring,cabinets,appliances,interior & exterior paint colors). I pay a monthly fee that includes all utilities, interior/exterior maintenance and top priority for future acceptance to the assisted living or skilled nursing as needed. I have no regrets and have peace of mind that my daughters will not be burdened with decisions to make as I age. I love it and suggest that you consider it. Best wishes for your healthy happy life.
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Reply to Kek338
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Don't wait. Many of the nicest ones have waiting lists. Those of us on the younger side need to keep this in mind. Planning ahead can be advantageous for this situation. I'm already looking at places that I want to consider for the future even though I have about 10 years of work ahead of me.
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Reply to Missymiss
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You might check to see if this agency can find you an independent living https://carepatrol.com/locations/ I see locations in Ashville NC and also in Tennesee which you might be familiar. This agent goes with you to help with a location. They get paid by the facility as a finders fee.

My mom lived in MA and found these communities had individual 2 BR cottages with garage on campus. She lived in one unit that the previous renters put a dog fence in the back. It was a very short walk to the main building which provided meals, light housekeeping weekly, and some entertainment. Because it was a large facility with 150 apartments, there was on site caregivers that she paid a fee based on the amount of time that was needed. Her care was for showers and twice a day medication assistance. This company has several facilities near you between western NC and Tennesee. Just type this into your browser:
holiday by atria facilities in nc locations
Some will pop up between Flat Rock and Knoxville
I do admit that you have a long wish list and you might have to make a compromise.
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Reply to MACinCT
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Do a search for senior apartments in your area. Lots of facilities offer these for people that don't really need a lot of assistance, but want to be around other seniors. Things like prepared meals and laundry are optional.

As your condition becomes more serious you will be able to move to rooms that provide more care, all at the same facility.

Quite frankly, a well typed google search will probably give you the information that you are seeking. That's what I did.
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Reply to olddude
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Google "Independent Living Facility Blue Ridge N.C."
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Reply to BarbBrooklyn
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Several organizations can help you make an informed decision:

1. Area Agencies on Aging (AAA):
These agencies provide information and assistance on various senior living options. They can help evaluate needs and recommend appropriate facilities. They can be found by visiting the National Association of Area Agencies on Aging (n4a) website: n4a.org.

2. Eldercare Locator: A public service of the U.S. Administration on Aging that connects older adults and their families to services including housing options. Visit their website: eldercare.acl.gov or call (800) 677-1116.

3. Geriatric Care Managers: These are professionals who specialize in helping older adults and their families navigate the complexities of aging. They can provide personalized advice on housing and care options. Find one through the Aging Life Care Association: aginglifecare.org.

By utilizing these available resources, you can make a well informed decision that best suits your current and future needs.

WishIng you both the very best in finding a new home that meets your needs and brings you happiness and comfort.
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Reply to HaveYourBack
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I'm not sure if this is helpful, or if your looking to move out of state.

But not far from me is Saratoga springs NY.

I feel like they really accommodate older people that are more use to nice things.

The race track brings in a lot of old money. It's a beautiful town there is a young party crowd. But there are a lot of nice condominiums for senior living.

Just a thought that went in my head when I read your post.
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Reply to Anxietynacy
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I have my eye on several Continuing Care Retirement Communities. When my husband passes, I will then get my name on waiting lists. The upfront cost to get in is not anything to sneeze at, but my heirs will get 90% back (at least in the ones I've checked out so far). Yes, there is a monthly fee, but it is worth it to me. And I can easily go from cottage / apartment to Assisted Liviing, nursing home, or memory care as needed.

My goal is to not burden my children with caregiving. I have literally given up my life to care for my husband (before that, mil, then long-distance for my parents). As my one son says, "Mom, you have no life. Something needs to change." Yes, it does. The change will be that my children will still have their lives. They will rest assured that I am safe. They will travel and do all the things I thought my retirement years would look like. They will not have to worry about me.

All that to say that I think a CCRC would be what you want. But you need to start now. Decide first where you want to live, then look for a CCRC that "fits" you. Or, do the reverse, find some CCRCs that you like and then decide which location is where you would like to spend your remaing years.
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Reply to graygrammie
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BarbChicago Jul 13, 2024
Hi to you. I’m here at the point where you will be eventually. After some 10 years of taking care of my husband I am now getting close to moving to a retirement community. After 40 years in our home it is a daunting prospect clearing out, selling and going to a new but close retirement community. My children are wonderful, after my husband died both my sons stayed awhile with me helping to get rid of medical equipment, donate his clothes and notify businesses etc. of his death. Fortunately we had created trusts years ago and consolidated accounts, etc so not too many notifications had to be made. My daughter is close by, but I don’t want to burden her and I want to be independent, so a retirement community in my neighborhood is where I’m going. Actually, looking forward to not worrying about snow or rain or anything else.
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I just wanted to commend you for making your own plans / being proactive! You know the new space will be smaller. I’d encourage you to take the opportunity to redecorate wherever you go with entirely new items. Small scale furniture and things made for a smaller place. If you’re not dragging around a lot of items (baggage in the end, really) it doesn't need to feel crowded or full! It’s exciting - think of all the new friends you’ll make.
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Reply to Lmkcbz
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evdoddzoe: Perhaps you can obtain the information that you're looking for through your town's COA (Council on Aging).
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