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My mom’s dementia was diagnosed 2yrs ago. I don’t get along with my 2 sisters. In the past 2yrs I have asked for help several times, especially to hire caretakers. The (POA) won’t hire more help. They are monitoring her through a Ring Doorbell Cam. Now, I believe they are monitoring me through this cam, which seems very inappropriate. They are not telling her the truth. They continue to lie and make false assumptions. She is continuously losing weight and they cancel doctor/Social Worker appts I make to get help, they talk for my mom. I’m not able to communicate with them anymore, to the point I have had to block them. What else can I do?

Can you give more information? Is she living alone? What do you mean they are monitoring you? There is no way to avoid being on camera if you are visiting her and a camera is there. If she has dementia, what is the worry about what they are telling her? Remember she chose one of them to be POA, not you, so you can disagree with their choices, but you are not in charge. What are you doing for your mom and to support your sister who is the POA? It is a thankless job, believe me.
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Reply to ShirleyDot
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No matter what you choose to do in this or any other decisons made for your mothere DOCUMENT EVERYTHING! I know it can get mundane or too much to add to an already full day. But any important decisions made for her on your behalf try to document even if it nothing but a photo on your phone, its got a time and date stamp. Try to remember to take care of yourself as well. Best of luck S.S.
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Reply to sheepherder
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If you're living with your mom move out ASAP, and if you're not I would just quit going to your moms and let whichever sibling is POA take things from there.
And you can always call APS to report a vulnerable adult living by themselves. They will come out and do an assessment of the situation, and if need be take over her care.
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Reply to funkygrandma59
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Do you live with her or in her neighborhood?
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Reply to JustAnon
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hi - report them - ask for your mother to be assessed as you feel shes vulnerable and not being looked after properly - need more care. I imagine like a lot of problems - your siblings may be more concerned about money. i dont necessarily think its wrong - your siblings monitoring 'everyone' to see they are looking after mum properly. What is strange is cancelling appointments and not addressing mothers needs, Speak to her doctor and ask if you dont know who you can report to if you feel your mother is being neglected/appointments being canceleld.
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Reply to Jenny10
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Report your mother as a vulnerable person with dementia to your local Adult Protective Services. After that, it will be out of your hands, but it sounds like it already is. The agency is tasked with looking into issues for seniors and providing help if needed
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Reply to Daughterof1930
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