She was very insistent that her feet couldn't support her when an aide and my sister attempted to help her in the two-step transfer from the wheelchair to the walker to the recliner. If your LO has ever done this, did the LO later forget that they thought their feet were insufficient (or forget that they were afraid to stand up)?
These diseases are brutal. I appreciate being able to come to this website and receive moral support from the people who post, read, and answer questions here. Thank you!
Time to invest now in a gait belt to better be able to assist your moms transfers, and not hurt yourself or her. You can watch videos online on how to properly use one.
Later on, after becoming bed bound, she would forget she couldn’t walk and would get out of bed and take a few steps and I would find her on her knees. She injured first one ankle and then the second one doing this. This was after she had started using the hospital bed but still at home on hospice. So, in her case, she could physically walk but not mentally and then after being bed-bound so long, couldn't safely physically walk on her own. She did do simple therapy from bed and even in rehab all during this time.
Once on a Telemed visit (years later) with her geriatric primary, she was asked to move her leg (while lying in bed) and she couldn't do it. When her long time aide came to get her up for her shower she moved her leg to stand up and then pivot around to sit in the shower chair. When that aide was on vacation, the other aides gave her a bed bath, saying they didn’t know she could get up.
Distraction seemed to help with aunt but might not with your mom. Each person is different and can have worse or better days.
I thought of it as a “short” in the wiring. Or a flickering light or a staticky radio. The signal is clear one day, not so much the next.
In the beginning I tried to fix it. Later, not so much. She passed at 98.
She is understandably scared.
Why are you transferring from wheelchair to walker to recliner? Why not just pull the wheelchair up alongside the recliner, and help her stand and pivot, then sit in the recliner? That is what I have done for years with my husband, until I became too weak to help him stand safely. I now transfer with a hoyer lift.
I still help him sit up on the side of the bed, so I can put a clean shirt on, then raise the bed height until he's almost standing, then I hold on to him, and pivot a quarter turn and sit him down in his wheelchair. I have a patient lift sling already in place on the wheelchair. I then wheel the wheelchair out to the living room, where I have the hoyer lift already in place, hook him up, and move him over his recliner with the lift, and lower him on to the seat. The sling stays in place under him, so when it's time to get him up, I simply move the hoyer lift over him, hook him up, and push him into the bedroom and lower him on to the bed. It's Really Hard pushing the lift with him in it, over a shag area rug in the living room, and the bedroom carpeting! Not to mention navigating through the doorway! It is a slow process, and takes a lot of strength, but it is easier on my body than trying to lift his weight repeatedly as I had previously done.
The short answer is, your mom is not going to become more abled. She will continue to become more dis-abled. You will have to keep up with her changing needs. And when you no longer can, then you find a care home for her.