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We were not sent to a rehab facility after surgery because the surgeon was concerned about infection risk. My father is not able to keep watch of her 24/7. Need ideas for how to support her recovery, his caretaking, and safety for her-especially at night when going to the bathroom.

Was there a nurse case manager or social worker or discharge planner at the hospital that discussed discharge plan and care at home? Call them for guidance and referral to local home care agencies. They can submit medical records and save you much time. Your mother should be getting home health care PT OT 2-3 times per week but they are only there for an hour or so. You can contact local home care agencies like Home Instead, Visiting Angels, Homewell, who can provide caregivers but your parents will have to private pay for this. There is also private caregivers and the local hospice agency may have a list of private caregivers. You have to vet them and agree on payment. The aides can help mom with bathroom, shower, dressing, meals and light housekeeping like dishes, her laundry, vacuuming her areas and cleaning her bathroom. Prices vary but 20-30+ per hour is standard with agencies. If Dad can manage her during the day, perhaps hire care for 12 hours overnight, 7p-7a to handle the overnights for 2-3 weeks. They can do a load of laundry overnight and get mom’s breakfast prepped and ready and make some sandwiches for during the day. They would help her toilet during overnight and get her showered and dressed in the morning before they leave. Mom has to adjust to this schedule for now. Home care aides can not dispense medication. Mom’s pills have to be put in the pill pack by dad or family. Aide can put the pills in front of mom and have a glass of water. Or, if dad can handle overnight fine, then hire caregiver during the day to assist your mother. Usually good to hire help when she’s most active and needs the most help with things and also to allow dad to get uninterrupted rest time. Or, insist that she needs a 10 day skilled nursing rehab stay to get mobile and safety discharge to home and call orthopedic surgeon to help arrange. For completeness, there is also acute inpatient rehab. These are usually the nice facilities with better staffing, 3 hours daily of rehab activities required and daily doctors visits and onsite nursing. These are usually reserved for medically complex patients or younger patients with huge rehab potential. Also for older patients who had a very high level of functional ability before their injury, stroke or surgery. This is covered by insurance or Medicare if medical necessity criteria are met. Generally, older patients with single joint replacement go to skilled nursing rehab.
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Reply to Beethoven13
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StephKing95 Oct 30, 2025
Thank you for this detailed answer! We have pleaded with our drs to get her into a rehab now but Medicare wont pay for it because we were discharged without it. The suregon didnt want the infection risk. We are working with a home health company, and as you also said, they arent meant for hours and hours of support. We are struggling to find some respite care we can afford. I WISH we could pay for overnight care - it's what is making me sick now to resolve. She is highly at risk for falling on route to bathroom because she forgets she had surgery.
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If you cannot afford to hire help, and if the doctor refuses to send your mother to rehab, then I guess a family member will have to sleep in her room on a cot to insure she has help toileting in the wee hours. Or family can take turns sleeping over until her recovery is complete. Mine took 4 weeks with a lot of daily walking.

Sounds to me like both your parents need either Memory Care Assisted Living or Skilled Nursing care now, if mom has advanced dementia and dad needs care as well. What's your plan? The house can be sold and the proceeds used to ginance AL and Memory Care, thrn apply for Medicaid for Skilled Nursing care when those funds run out.

Good luck.
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Reply to lealonnie1
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If you can’t get her in rehab, then in-home health aides, CNA or similar seem like the next option. You may be able to get two doing 12-hour shifts or a live-in for a month or two? Call the agencies near you. Good luck!!
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Reply to Suzy23
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StephKing95 Oct 30, 2025
Can't afford that :(
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That doesn't seem like a responsible decision by the surgeon! I agree with Rosered about asking for a reconsideration.
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Reply to MG8522
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StephKing95 Oct 30, 2025
Agreed. We have. No luck.
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Hire CNA's in the home. They can accompany Mom to her PT appointments and do her range of motion exercises in the home.

Alternatively, get her in rehab.
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Reply to brandee
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The most important thing is to make sure that your mom is getting up and walking every now and again. You can put a bedside commode next to her bed so she doesn't have to travel far at night when she gets up to pee.
Moms doctor should have ordered PT to come to the house and you can hire part-time aides when you feel your mom needs the most help.
Hip replacement surgery isn't nearly as complicated as it once was, so hopefully your mom will recover sooner than later and this will all be be behind you except for her dementia as that will only continue to get worse.
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Reply to funkygrandma59
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I suggest contacting the surgeon and asking for reconsideration of the decision about the rehab facility. I think your mom faces bigger risks being at home at this point.
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Reply to Rosered6
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StephKing95 Oct 30, 2025
We have tried.
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It may be time to look into memory care facilities or skilled nursing care facilities.
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