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Mostly Independent
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Whattodo - My mother, too, had accused me and other people of taking her things. It was so frustrating and maddening because she was the one that hid those things and then couldn't find them. Then she went into a panic, and started to accuse me or someone else of taking her things. This phase lasted for almost a year. I hope it won't last that long for your mom.
If the cops don't know by now that your mother has Alz., I recommend you let them know, tell them that being paranoid and accusing people of stealing are part of her Alz. symptoms.
My mom also went through a phase of shoplifting. Yes, shoplifting. I took her along when I went shopping, and she would take little things, like a small bag of chip, or a chocolate bar, and stuffed them into her purse or pocket. One time, she took a fake diamond necklace from a department store. Another time, she took a sample perfume bottle. Ugh! I was always on edge as I tried to watch her every second we were in the store. Thankfully, that phase ended. But now, it's something else...
Could you track down where she usually hides things, then clean out the cupboard so that the ‘stolen’ things are very obvious. Or perhaps leave what she will think is a good hiding place but you can check easily. Letting the police know is a good idea – they may even keep a record of ‘nuisance’ calls for her and her usual type of complaints (ie NOT that the house has caught fire, which is different and might be serious). Based on other posts, you can’t stop this, just try and make it easier to deal with.
Agree with alerting the police to her cognitive condition. It would help if you could provide a letter from her doctor regarding her diagnosis. Does she have her own cell phone? Maybe this access needs to be restricted as well...
Whattodowithmom, may I suggest you have your Mom tested for an Urinary Tract Infection. Such an infection can mimic dementia and the variety of things related to dementia. The infection can be cleared with antibodies.
It worth checking out. If your Mom is tested positive, hopefully treatment can calm the paranoid.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
If the cops don't know by now that your mother has Alz., I recommend you let them know, tell them that being paranoid and accusing people of stealing are part of her Alz. symptoms.
My mom also went through a phase of shoplifting. Yes, shoplifting. I took her along when I went shopping, and she would take little things, like a small bag of chip, or a chocolate bar, and stuffed them into her purse or pocket. One time, she took a fake diamond necklace from a department store. Another time, she took a sample perfume bottle. Ugh! I was always on edge as I tried to watch her every second we were in the store. Thankfully, that phase ended. But now, it's something else...
It worth checking out. If your Mom is tested positive, hopefully treatment can calm the paranoid.