Or where I went to on an errand. Time means little to him. He is impaired in many ways. However, he is able to speak lucidly & come up with his own ideas. I'm his only caregiver b/c he refuses to have an aide. He actually told the one I hired to leave! Also, he would "blow the place up" if I tried to place him in a facility.Any tips on helping him know where I am going? Whether he has eaten?
He won't have an aide, you say. He told the aide to leave! He'll blow up a facility! Time to realize that he's no longer in charge. He's too sick to make decisions for himself. If you manage to get through to him where you're going or whether he's eaten, he won't remember it anyway. He won't be able to contact you where you've gone, like to the store. He won't know how. You could leave him a tray of sandwiches, but he's well into dementia, and he may end up flushing them down the toilet because he doesn't know what they are. I'm not making any of this up. It's what happens with elders who have dementia. I've been a family home caregiver for 4 of them.
Please place him soon. He won't blow the place up. That's nonsense, like a whole lot of other things he's saying to intimidate you. Time for you to take over, be firm, and do whatever you have to do to keep him safe. My guess is that he's always been the boss in your marriage. Now you're lost and afraid. The rest of your journey as a married couple is going to be hard, but you'll get through it like a lot of other people on this site.
Good luck with what you have to do. I'm so sorry.
You will need to do difficult but helpful things now. I wish you success, Please take care of yourself!
Your husband should not be left alone anymore as you never know what he may get into while you are away.
And of course you need in-home help, so next time you hire someone you tell him that they are coming to help YOU, not him. Hopefully he will be more open to that.
Your husband will only continue to get worse, so please don't hesitate to get him placed in the appropriate facility if his care gets to be too much for you, as you matter too in this equation.