My mother moved to supportive independent living 16 months ago. She needs to move to AL or memory care, and doesn't see the need.

My mother will be 87 in less than two weeks, very agile for her age. It fools people into thinking she is in good shape. She was diagnosed with Moderate Dementia and Alzheimer's in Dec 2025. She currently lives in a one bedroom apartment with a small kitchenette and a community room the 4 other residents share. They get meals provided Monday - Friday, cleaning services and help with laundry if needed. She is wearing out her welcome in the building. She has a Pomeranian dog that barks constantly. Her short term memory is getting to be terrible. The staff thinks she needs a higher level to keep her busy and out of trouble. She creates problems weekly. Hounding the maintenance, dietary, cleaning staff about something. The other residents are also feeling it. She is always in everybody else's business. Her PCP isn't very cooperative she basically has show timers at every appointment. Her neurologist is hit or miss and not all that helpful. I am an only child with a husband that has multiple health issues. I can't do it all, but she is insistent that she doesn't need to move to a higher level, mainly because she won't be able to take her dog.The dog is a whole other story. She yells at him and hits him with a newspaper frequently. When I bring him to my house, he barely lets out a peep, and acts like a completely different dog. Her wild energy sets him off, and he clearly is stressed. When I am there, I always take him out for a walk and a potty break. She always says she just took him out. He claws at my pantleg in desperation, so it's the first thing I do, every single time.There is a lot to unpack here, and she's able to fool a lot of people for awhile, but even her church people are seeing she is not with it for the most part and have made their thoughts known to me. I take her for haircuts all medical and dental appointments, grocery shopping for weekends and snacks, all the vet appointments for the dog. She acts out lots of the times in the stores. One time last summer walking out of the dressing room in her underwear. I went to get her another size of jeans, and the next thing I know, she is in the store part, not in the dressing room in just her underwear. Sometimes, I think she does things like that to insight me. It's been the same or similar my whole life. When checking out she explains to the cashier that I handle her money. Well, I sure do, it was a hot mess when I took it over 2 years ago. The list goes on and on. I would like her to get moved before she hurts herself or someone else. For example: She locked the door of her building one night this winter, leaving a man outside in the cold. He uses a walker, and had just gone out the door two steps to put his garbage bag in the can outside the door. It's a French door with windows, his walker would have been next to the door. She didn't see him or the walker??? He had to walk around the entire building, in the snow, after dark to get in the front door. No one knows why she did that. It's scary. How do you know when it's time to get a higher level of care, and how to make the move without tantrums and drama every single day?