My FIL has been in a hospital or rehab since November 2. He had necrotizing fasciitis and a large portion of calf tissue removed. He was pretty much confined to his scooter before this, he used a walker for toiletting and showering. Now he is confined to his bed - PT has resulted in no measurable progress. He is diapered at the rehab facility. Amputation has been considered.
Today the social worker called and said that progress has plateaued and that he is scheduled to be discharged next week. We have a care conference scheduled for tomorrow Morning. This all just came up suddenly. I know that he is not ready to be home, but insurance can’t/won’t pay for him at rehab since he plateaued. I want to enter tomorrow’s conference as prepared as possible - it’s hard to ask questions, let alone the right questions, when you don’t understand so much! I think if FIL is discharged home he will end up right back in the hospital within 2 weeks max. MIL has a lot of her own issues and can’t care for him. My husband and I work and are raising our two busy teens, so we aren’t able to provide the level of care he needs. What options should we look at? I’m at a loss. They have minimal assets and just Medicare and a small supplemental insurance. Our home is a mother/daughter set up and they live with us, but independently.
Thank you for reading. I know it was long. I’ll take whatever prayers, support, or advice you have!
Is it possible that somehow the hospital has mistakenly gotten the impression that you and your husband are chomping at the bit to take on FIL's care? Definitely disabuse them of this notion.
I hope others have additional suggestions for you.
This is just a summary to give you an idea. There's more involved.
To receive Medicaid, all assets will have to be liquidated. This goes for bonds, shares, stocks, IRAs, CDs, insurance policies, etc. Maybe just Dads half? Funerals can be prepaid. Half of assets hers, His half will have to be spent down to no more than 2k. Some of his SS may be used to offset his care but Mom will not be impoverished. She will stay in the home but will need to keep the house up.
Like I said, this is just a summary. I agree, you need to be firm and say there is no way Mom can care for Dad. What he has is very serious. Has to be watched and bandaged. I don't think its something that a lay person should be responsible for. My daughter is a woundcare nurse who has training. Amputation is another thing depending on his age and mental compacity and overall health.
an Assisted Living Facility down th street in spite of dad's physical therapist trying mightily to prevent It! Prepare your words carefully for the case manager....stand your ground, give em hell if need be, just don't back down! Your dad is in NO condition to be released to YOU, period.
I know how worried you are....the elder care crisis we are facing in this country is REAL and it's very very frightening. Do not hesitate to call an elder care attorney if need be. And also tell the rehab fools you need MORE TIME and 24 hrs notice is NOT enough!
Sending you a big hug and a few prayers, too. Good luck!!