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My husband lost his hearing while in the military for 25 years. His hearing has progressively gotten worse. He’s had hearing aids about 4 years now, recently getting a new pair. I encourage him all the time to wear them, yet he refuses. In our so-called conversations I am constantly having to repeat myself and often he doesn’t hear the full context or misses information. It has gotten to the point that I’ve tried talking to him & explaining the HA aren’t just for him, but for me too, yet he refuses. I am now at my wits end and do not even want to try to have any conversation with him. He gets angry that I’m not talking to him. I have found myself not only yelling at him to get him to hear me but sounding angry or mean, sometimes both. I do not want that but I am at my end &no longer want to even deal with it. What do I do?

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Tell him you won't speak to him at all unless he's wearing his hearing aids. That it's just too difficult to communicate w/o them. If new ones are needed, fine, he should get them. Otherwise he'll be living in a world of silence, which also brings on dementia or exacerbates existing dementia. It's easy enough to fix this, your choice dear.
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Reply to lealonnie1
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Your husband needs to be aware of the connections between ignored hearing loss and dementia. My MIL is there now, after years of refusing hearing aids, she now has dementia. Many years of missing out on hearing has consequences. Don’t yell, that’s just frustrating you both. White board and marker for whatever needs communicating
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Reply to Daughterof1930
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Reply to Suzy23
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My husband has worn hearing aides since an accident at 4. The best were the analog because you heard exactly how the person sounds. It was explained to me by an audiologist that not so with the digitals. They are more mechanical sounding. People have a hard time with this. It takes at least 2 weeks or longer for the brain to adjust to digitals. They need to be worn all the time for this to happen.

Stop yelling. And I agree, after 45 yrs of marriage, I too sound angry when I need to talk louder and repeat my self. You may want to look at him when you talk and be right next to him. Does he have one ear better than the other, stay on that side. Tell him you will talk when you have something you need to tell him. But no full blown conversations until he uses his aids.

Ask why he does not like them. Some now have micro tubes that go in the ear. My Mom did not like them and switched to ear molds. The one problem with earmolds is the fit. Too tight you get a sore inner ear. Too lose and you get a whistle. The tubes attached, if you have over the ear, they can get earwax and need to be cleaned out. When you first fitted for a new hearing aide, there maybe tweeking needed. Every year the hearing aid should be checked. Tubing replaced because it hardens. Digital are computer adjusted. The high goes only so hi, the low, only so low. The setting when you turn it on, is the comfortable setting. When hearing gets worse, the digital needs to be adjusted.

Hope this helps. His world will be so much better if he could hear. I just downloaded the app for my husbands aid. Trying to see if it will bluetooth to my phone. I can adjust his hearing level from my phone. Also turn on and off background noise. If you can bluetooth, he hears a cell phone call right thru his hearing aid.
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Reply to JoAnn29
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Cherios, welcome to the forum. Time to start using a white-board and write on it whatever you need to talk to hubby about. White-board can be used over and over again.


I had a similar issue with my hubby not hearing me. He finally saw an Ear, Nose, & Throat doctor and it turned out the wax in his ears had harden like cement. In the mean time, I was getting so frustrated at speaking loudly that I was actually yelling, and I hated that, so I can understand what you are going through.
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Reply to freqflyer
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