Family would pay us for services. My elderly grandfather moved in with my husband and i 8 years ago. Due to his declining health and dementia, we have modified our lives, started working from home, used vacation time for dr's appointments, etc to the point that one of us needs to quit to be full time primary caregiver. We do not feel that a nursing home is an option. we would pay a caregiver m ore than I make per hour. Also, he gets anxious when surrounded with new people, my family is no help so that is not an option. I just want to make sure we have covered all bases. he does not qualify for Medicaid and we want the money he does have left to last him as long as possible
Who knows - that work from home trend may actually in the long run make in home caregiving more feasible.
I remember when the concept of a day care in corporate HQs was unheard of. Now it's a perk.
I don't think I could have worked effectively from home and also raised children -- unless I had a child-care person there also. And, yes there were some interruptions from my husband, but it was not a deal breaker. The poster here already has experience with working from home, so they both should realize what they are getting into.
More than 20% of the US working population works from home at least one day a week. This helps reduce the wear and tear on roads, the pollution from automobiles, investment in "work" wardrobes, and has lots of other benefits. But it may increase to cost of heating and cooling homes (for longer periods each day), can cause feelings of isolation, and create problems when communication isn't clear.
It is an increasing trend, quite aside from the caregiving issue. If you are a caregiver, and you have to earn a living, and you have skills/knowledge/experience that can be deployed via computer from your home, it is an option to consider seriously.
Is it for everyone? Absolutely not. Will it work in all situations? Certainly not. But it is a good option for many.
I wish more would write about trying to work from home. Guess it depends on the type of work, if you needed to speak with Clients through-out the day, or be on conference calls. I remember one writer here who had to quit working from home because her Mom would be banging at the door and/or yelling at times when the writer was on the phone with clients.
Jeannegibbs its nice to hear from someone who has been in a similar work from home situation and made it work. I am also highly disciplined which is why I know my work cannot continue to be interuped as much as it has.i think I'm harder on myself than my boss is. I am arranging for a part time caretaker for the busier part of his day while I work from home and for some evenings that we have things to do with our child. we are hopeful that he can live out his days at home but I think we are preparing for the future.
It was the perfect solution for me. I am highly disciplined (in some things!) and kept very careful track of the time I worked. I was doing things I knew how to do and had had a lot of experience in while working in a traditional setting. I will say that it always took me 7 days to get in 40 hours and that I was never really "off" work, but the flexibility in hours allowed me to keep my husband at home while I supported us. My employer was very satisfied with the quality and timeliness of my work.
Working from home is a very sensible, practical option for many people, whether or not they also have caregiving duties. It is not for everyone!
For a few years my husband went out to a day program for a few hours. That was when I scheduled work meetings and also my own appointments. Later we had a PCA who saw to his needs while I worked in my home office.
The fact that the poster here is considering one person working from home and the other being the caregiver is MUCH more feasible than one person working from home and also being the primary caregiver.
There are a lot of risks in the plan to keep GF at home. But I don't see the "working from home" aspect as being a particularly risky part. It can be a very satisfying and practical approach.
Right now Grandpa is easy to work with for one caregiver, but tomorrow might bring something entirely new to deal with, and one caregiver even with you helping can become exhausting. Before you know it, you both are doing the work for 3 full-time caregivers each day. These are things you need to plan for in the future.
If you see that Grandpa is starting to run out of money for care, quickly get him to apply for Medicaid by calling your State Medicaid office to see what rules, regulations and program they offer [each State is different]. Medicaid will pay for full time care in a nursing home and play for the cost of the nursing home.
By the way, how old is your grandfather? To someone in their 30's, a person who is 60 is elderly. Just trying to put a gage here as to what would be his time line. My parents lived into their mid-to-late 90's. Would your hubby want to be out of work for maybe a decade or more? That would create a financial havoc that would be hard to fix.
I hope GF is paying something for room and board.
Plan ahead for respite care. Either charge enough to be able to save some to pay for respite out of that, or specify who/how respite is going to be provided. Even without working another job you cannot provide 3 shifts of care 24/7/365 without vacations and breaks and remain sane. Can't be done. So build that right in to your plans.
If GF runs out of money, he can apply for Medicaid for in-home care, or, if it is necessary, nursing home care. That is one reason it is essential that monetary arrangements be put in contract form. Medicaid does not expect applicants to have been living on nothing. Room and Board and Care payments are perfectly legitimate expenses. But gifting could disqualify him. So make it clear that the money you are getting from him is NOT a gift.
If family is really willing to pay for GF's care, would it be better to hire an outsider and keep your own jobs? If one of you can work from home, then GF will continue to have your reassuring presence even when the care needs are being provided by the hired person. I'm thinking that since this is your GF and not your parent you may still have a long working life ahead of you, and perhaps not interrupting your career might have some value. If one of you does stop working for a few years, think ahead about how you'll stay current enough to reenter the job market later.
GF has been with you 8 years already. You've seen the decline and presumably know what you are getting into. If you treat the money you get for this as an income from working, and you are careful to cover health insurance, arrange for vacations, and if the income is at least what "hired" help would charge, then perhaps this could work.
I caution you, however, that declaring that " a nursing home is not an option" is just not realistic. You know what the situation is like now, but you do not know what the future holds. Dementia very often ends up where three shifts of care are needed -- and it is care that is nearly impossible to provide in a private home, whether you are working an outside job or not. So hope for the best -- that GF can live out is life in your home, perhaps with hospice care at the end -- but keep an open mind about options in case the best does not transpire.
The above is an eye opener and a lot to think above. When you add up ALL the funds you would lose, what you pay someone to be a caregiver doesn't look all that bad. Now, as you know with Dementia it is only going to get worse and you will need 3-shifts of caregivers.
Another thing to think about, what if something happens to you and your hubby, then what? Would family come to the rescue or would Grandfather need to go into a continuing care facility?
My Dad [94] is in a senior living facility and he is happy as a clam there. Yet he came there from a large home which he was glad to get away from, just too much worry at his age. And he's around people closer to his own age.
Will the person who continues to work add the stay at home caregiver to his/her medical coverage so that he/she still has medical insurance? Who will provide care when you need assistance, or just to get out for relief?
To cover all bases, think about when you might need additional in home help and who will pay for it. Think about how confining it will be for whoever quits his/her job and stays home full time to be the caregiver. Think about when your grandfather declines and needs more help. Think about when you'll feel trapped and tied down. Think about the funds and benefits you'll lose - are you prepared to sacrifice them, and can the other partner support you if you do?
And read posts from other caregivers who've quit work to be fulltime caregivers - consider their dilemmas and dissatisfaction, and ensure that you're prepared for it.
When GF's funds do run out, what do you plan then?