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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
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Does she have a medical diagnosis of dementia? If this behavior is a sudden change, please have her checked for a UTI. Many elderly (especially women) get a lot of UTIs and they often don't come with physical symptoms that the patient can express (like pain when urinating, urgency to pee, etc) but DO create behavioral/cognitive symptoms. It can be cleared up with antibiotics but please be aware that the elderly get UTIs very often, even if her hygiene is good. Teepa Snow has very informative (and entertaining) videos on dementia on YouTube. You may find them helpful.
Your profile states that your mom has dementia. Is this a clinical evaluation or just your hunch? If it's your hunch, she's needs to get a dementia screening by her PCP. If her PCP has already determined this, then further evaluation needs to be done including a psychiatric visit. Her behavior is very dangerous to her and the household. It is also quite common. My wife was very destructive in her first few days in MC but psychiatric intervention resolved the problem. This is the time you have to look at your caregiving capacity and decide if maybe it's time to check out care facilites.
Their brain is dying. With your Moms behaviour I would say she is in her childhood. "Her" home is no longer familiar she wants to be in the home of her childhood. That is where she is in her head. And if she thinks she is a child, she will act like one.
If you haven't had her diagnosed for the type of Dementia she has, you should. There are meds that she can be given to calm her down. Knowing the correct Dementia will help with prescribing the correct medication.
She sounds terrified - in her mind she is in a strange place among strange people who won't let her go home and she is fighting to get back with everything she has. This isn't good for her or for her caregivers, if it were me I'd rather have her medicated into a stupor if that was the only option than living in constant fear (but it shouldn't have to be all or nothing, hopefully something can be found that will giver her a degree of peace without that level of sedation).
Contact your mom's PCP to see if she can be prescribed some anti agitation medication to calm her down. Many times, women in particular who want familiarity or to see their mother's again find comfort when given a baby doll to hold and swaddle. Doing so gives them a sense of motherhood again and a renewed purpose in life. You can buy an expensive "Alzheimer's" doll or go to eBay or Target and buy a lifelike infant for a fraction of the price. Be sure to get a blanket to swaddle the baby in as well. Give it a try..........it's a lot easier than lots of other things!
My mom was like this in the last year of her life. She was in a SNF. I was visiting her and dropped my cell phone under her bed. My mother hated seeing me use my cell phone. When I got down to retrieve the phone my mom grabbed my hair and wouldn’t let go. She just got very angry. There was pretty much nothing I could do until she let go. I couldn’t get her to let go and didn’t want to pull back or she could have fallen. So I just stayed there until she decided to loosen her grip.
It was no big deal; it passed. Just another day in caring for an elderly loved one. But she was prone to bouts of anger out of nowhere. She also took swings at my brother a few times. It’s very unfortunate but part of the disease.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
If you haven't had her diagnosed for the type of Dementia she has, you should. There are meds that she can be given to calm her down. Knowing the correct Dementia will help with prescribing the correct medication.
https://www.ebay.com/itm/10-Reborn-Baby-Dolls-Lifelike-Newborn-Full-Vinyl-Silicone-Realistic-Doll-Gifts/312575050802?hash=item48c6ecc432:g:zScAAOSwIzBazep-
Good luck!
My mom was like this in the last year of her life. She was in a SNF. I was visiting her and dropped my cell phone under her bed. My mother hated seeing me use my cell phone. When I got down to retrieve the phone my mom grabbed my hair and wouldn’t let go. She just got very angry. There was pretty much nothing I could do until she let go. I couldn’t get her to let go and didn’t want to pull back or she could have fallen. So I just stayed there until she decided to loosen her grip.
It was no big deal; it passed. Just another day in caring for an elderly loved one. But she was prone to bouts of anger out of nowhere. She also took swings at my brother a few times. It’s very unfortunate but part of the disease.